Wednesday, December 18, 2013

Edible Gardens

I like gardening - it's a place where I find myself when I need to lose myself. - Alice Sebold
Edible Cities is a new book about gardening in unusual urban spaces. New to me that is. It is out in a paperback edition.

You can have fresh Herbs, Fruits and Vegetables without pesticides and with fabulous flavor. You can have them if the only space you have to garden is a sunny window, a wall, a balcony or an abandoned building next door.

Trust me, your own homegrown Oregano will have a flavor that is intoxicating. Fresh or dried, your Oregano will surpass any dusty commercial pulverized Oregano you can buy in the supermarkets. I thought I did not like Oregano. And then I grew and dried my own.

Did you know that it is easy to grow Mushrooms at home? Oh the possibilities are many and fascinating.

In side the book you will find:
• Principles of permaculture
• Worldwide examples of urban gardening projects
• Ideas for flats and balconies
• Green roofs
• Vertical gardening and urban beekeeping
• Guerrilla gardening and successful community projects
• Illustrated practical techniques with clear instructions
Scorzonera
A few plants that will grow in a sunny window:

Watercress (Nasturtium officinale)
Mustard cress (Lepidium sativum)
Swiss chard (Beta vulgaris ssp. vulgaris)
New Zealand spinach (Tetragonia tetragonoides)
Parsley (Petroselinium crispum)
Peppermint (Mentha piperita)
Lettuce (Lactuca sative)
Scorzonera (Scorzonera hispanica)

Monday, December 16, 2013

Arianna is a Big Dumb Banana

UPDATE:
I wrote the article below in October 2010. All hail the Goddess Karma. Things are not looking good at HuffPo.
While there’s no way to confirm hard numbers, it seems thousands of users if not more, are leaving the Huffington Post (also known as HuffPost) and its previously robust community because of the newly introduced comment system. By Epoch Times | December 15, 2013

I despise censors and censorship. Free speech is a basic human right safeguarded by the Constitution of the USA. I have always been impressed by the Constitution.

The Huffingon Post censorship is capricious and rude. Discussion is controlled to a fare-thee-well. A post may appear, then disappear, then reappear again or never be published at all. Those who would like a thorough discussion of egregious HuffPo censorship should go to this site:

http://reddogbear.blogspot.com/2010/05/free-speech.html

The Huffington Post employs a robot to censor public discussion. Management claims the CensorBot can even detect sarcasm. A partnership has been formed to sell the CensorBot technology to others. I have since writing this learned IT is called "content analysis."

I am going to discuss one discrete part of the censorship that troubles me. HuffPo's account of the censorship on the site purports to be benign and limited. We shall see.

I created a test entitled HuffPo Consumer Community Moderation and Censorship Test. I operated the test on their own social network discussion pages. I alerted their Moderators to what I was doing, or tried to.This test was conducted during the flaming controversy about Dr. Laura using The N Word. The results were fascinating to me, at least.

Test #1
I posted a quotation from James Baldwin in the thread about race and language. The quote comes from the introduction to The Fire Next Time, a seminal book about race relations in America. In the Introduction, James Baldwin is explaining why he wrote the book dedicated to his beloved nephew.

This sentence is one of the most well known introductory sentences in American literature. There is no better indictment of using The N Word than this sentence. James Baldwin does not make it through the CensorBot. The problem? In the quote James Baldwin uses a word the CensorBot does not like. How can you have a reasonable discussion when things you post that are relevant and poignant are censored? Here is the quote:
"You can only be destroyed by believing that you really are what the white world calls a 'nigger.' I tell you this because I love you, and please don't you ever forget it."
In Arianna's World, James Baldwin is not allowed to say that about race and racist language because The CensorBot does not like it. Say what?

Test #2
I posted two songs from Hair. For those who don't know the musical, it was a work of art that was a direct response to the civil rights struggle and racism. I will post the two songs below.

Black Boys is one part of a two part piece. Black women sing about how beautiful white men are, and then white women sing about how beautiful black men are. A trio of white women sing and dance:


Black boys are delicious
Chocolate flavored love
Licorice lips like candy
Keep my cocoa handy
I have such a sweet tooth
When it comes to love
Once I tried a diet
Of quiet, rest, no sweets
But I went nearly crazy
And I went clearly crazy
Because I really craved for
My chocolate flavored treats
Black boys are nutritious
Black boys fill me up
Black boys are so damn yummy
They satisfy my tummy
I have such a sweet tooth
When it comes to love
Black black black black
Black black black black
Black boys
First, the song was censored by the Bot, which I think marked it as needing human intervention. A human then decided that it was not racist and the song reappeared.

The second song was Colored Spade. There is no song that indicts white racism in America that is more scathing. Sometimes humans will pass on something the CensorBot does not like and posts can appear, disappear and reappear in HuffPo Land. This song was censored completely and never appeared at all. Go to the link to hear the song:


I'm a
Colored A nigger
A black nigger
A jungle bunny
Jigaboo coon
Pickaninny mau mau
Uncle Tom
Aunt Jemima
Little Black Sambo
Cotton pickin'
Swamp guinea
Junk man
Shoeshine boy
Elevator operator
Table cleaner at Horn & Hardart
Slave voodoo
Zombie
Ubangi lipped
Flat nose
Tap dancin'
Resident of Harlem
And president of
The United States of Love
I said President of
The United States of Love
(and for dinner at the White House you're going to feed him:)
Watermelon
Hominy grits
An' shortnin' bread
Alligator ribs
Some pig tails
Some black eyed peas
Some chili
Some collard greens
And if you don't watch out
This boogie man will get you
Booooooooo!
So you say.
Evidently, in HuffPo Land, it is okay to fuck black men but you should not let them tell how it feels to be the fuckee. One more test to go.

Test #3
I posted this poem, author unknown but believed by some to be a child. The poem is taught in Black Studies courses in college. The poem is a wry and potent indictment of racism IMO. It was censored entirely by HuffPo:
When I was born, I was black.
When I grew up, I was black.
When I get hot, I am black.
When I get cold, I am black.
When I am sick, I am black.
When I die, I am black.
When you were born, You were pink.
When you grew up, You were white.
When you get hot, You go red.
When you get cold, You go blue.
When you are sick, You go purple.
When you die, You go green.
AND YET YOU CALL ME COLORED?
- by an Anonymous pupil of King Edward VI School, Birmingham, UK.
Conclusion
If you go to the Huffington Post to discuss politics and culture because of Ariannna Huffington's media reputation as a progressive populist, you will be defrauded. No such discussion can take place.

I know image creation and misrepresentation-not-quite-illegal is the behavior du jour of the Effete Elite in America these days; I do not have to like it. Or take it. God bless the InterNet. Where else are you going to go to complain?

A New Way to Play Botticelli with UPDATES

This photograph so reminds me of Botticelli. What do you think? I think a new growth in Feminist thought and political action is a good thing. For more photographs of FEMEN protests, go to the links below:



La Primavera by Sandro Botticelli 
I myself have never been able to find out precisely what feminism is:  I only know that people call me a feminist whenever I express sentiments that differentiate me from a door mat or a prostitute.  ~Rebecca West, "Mr Chesterton in Hysterics: A Study in Prejudice," The Clarion, 14 Nov 1913, reprinted inThe Young Rebecca, 1982
UPDATE 2: 
Some Russians are torturing and murdering LGBT and/or taking their children. All of this so that some male Russians can prove they and Putin are not wusses in the worldwide who-has-got-the-biggest-dick contest. It is not working. No matter what Putin does now, he looks like an anus to somebodys around the world. .

Translation is "Fuck you, Putin" as far as I can make out. Second that emotion. It seems the women of Femens have the biggest dicks worldwide, metaphorically speaking of course. If a native speaker sees this and can give me a better translation, please do so.

UPDATE 1: 
I wrote this in September of 2012. The FEMEN movement just keeps growing. I must be getting old. I am not sure if these young women are foolish or brave. I will go with impossibly brave. They have a new branch in Turkey. Turkey.


. . . nobody gives you power.  You just take it.  ~ Roseanne Barr


Sunday, December 15, 2013

Pennsylvania - Eldreth Pottery - POTTERY IS CLOSED


I am a collector of vintage American Pottery. I have over the years collected some fine pieces of McCoy and Stangl among many other American Potters. I collect both useful and Art pieces. In this era of mass production, I prize the beautiful and unique.

I make old time pickles and preserves. I want pottery crocks that will do the job and look good on the counter. I made Brandied Seckel Pears (divine and never cooked or refrigerated) in a covered clay crock from the turn of the century. The alcohol content kept all bad buggies and mold away. I am going to make natural sauerkraut in a crock as I have no room for a barrel. The best book I know on home food preservation is Marion Brown's Pickles and Preserves. Marion Brown was one of the foremost food writers of the 50s and 60s.

As I began the search for clay crocks suitable for preserving and pickling, I discovered modern Pennsylvania potters whose work is beautiful and useful. I am not the only lover and collector of American Pottery. There are Pottery Tours. Who knew? I am going to share with you what I discover about Pennsylvania's Potters and pottery lovers as I discover it.

I found the perfect one gallon Crock. It comes from Eldreth Pottery. You can pick the design on your Crock. Your choices range from this Pig to more traditional designs. You can even have your Name on it.

Eldreth's Christmas Art is lovely and each piece is
one-of-a-kind. Every object represented here made by Eldreth Pottery.













Saturday, December 14, 2013

Way to go, Larry Farnese and Matt Bradford! Now get to work, my fellow FemiNazis. Fly! Volunteer! Vote!

Larry Farnese
All this good work for women and their children and Farnese is sexy too. I like him. The photograph comes from the Philadelphia Magazine profile. Photograph by Ben Leuner.

And Rep. Bradford and his Family are the very image of a happy wholesome American Family. Mrs. Bradford is a hottie. I tip my Red Hat to you courageous sensible people.
Ensuring safe access to health-care facilities: 
State Sen. Larry Farnese (D-Philadelphia) served as a volunteer clinic escort before joining the senate, so he has particular insight into the harassment that occurs outside clinics. He’s preparing to introduce SB 1208, a bill that would “enact a statewide buffer zone outside health-care facilities located in the Commonwealth of Pennsylvania.” The intention is to create a 15-foot buffer zone around driveways and entrances to health-care facilities.

State Rep. Matt Bradford (D-Montgomery), sponsor of the house companion bill, HB 1891, emphasized that the bill was “content neutral,” meaning that it would apply to all health-care facilities, not just those offering abortion services. “While everybody is entitled to their personal beliefs, people should not be allowed to interfere with the rights of others by blocking [them],” he said."  - from RHRealityCheck.org. .
Editor's Note: Stalking is a crime.

Rep. Matt Bradford and Family

Saturday, December 7, 2013

My Warmies, My Dog and Me

There is a way to stay warm in Winter, indoors and out. That way is wearing layers of clothing. And never forget your hat.
Nevertheless, layers are a good thing because they trap air in between them, which acts as an insulator for heat. And they can be put on and taken off depending on the varying situations  - Alok Jha, How to Dress for Antarctica
I am not dressing for polar regions. I am a Holiday Inn kind of girl. I do not camp out. A dog showed up at my house one day, fully grown, and now she is my Baby. I like to go outside and walk the dog in the snow. And I consider the weekday one mile walk to the post office part of my plan to stay healthy and active.
Layering your clothing is a tried-and-true way to maximize your comfort in the outdoors. The beauty of this simple concept is that it allows you to make quick adjustments based on your activity level and changes in the weather.
Each layer has a function. The base layer (against your skin) manages moisture; the insulating layer protects you from the cold; the shell layer(outer layer) shields you from wind and rain. You simply add or subtract layers as needed.
For a deeper understanding, read on.
I write this for all the Folks like me who walk their dog in the snow. Now you know how to keep from shivering. I write this to introduce CuddlDuds warmies. I wear them. I write this because I love my dog. Dogs are good people. They need lots of exercise. This post was created in partnership with eAccountable. All opinions are my own. Let it SNOW!


Political Signs - December 2013


Tis the season to be political. Happy Holidays!
Christmas should be about politics and not presents, according to a new study into the meaning of Christmas.
The author of a new report, The Politics of Christmas, Dr Stephen Holmes said “Our modern view of Christmas is largely a Victorian invention, thanks to the imagery within Charles Dickens’ tale A Christmas Carol, and bears little resemblance to the story as told in the gospels. The Christmas story is intensely political, with St Matthew and St Luke focusing their sights on firm questions of economic exploitation, imperial oppression, social stigma, and petty tyranny..”




Click Me!


If you think this is rude, just google "naked Santa images" or "naked Sarah Palin" and you will see I have been relatively polite and restrained. 

Thursday, December 5, 2013

"Woman is the nigger of the world." - Ono/Lennon with UPDATE

Update: The Roman Catholic Bishops idea of social justice is nowhere to be found where women and their children are concerned. How many women will die or be tortured in Roman Catholic hospitals? This kiddy-raping woman-killing stuff they do is thought to be moral? God bless the ACLU.
A Michigan mother-of-two has claimed a Catholic hospital could have killed her after it forced her to suffer through a painful miscarriage at 18 weeks because it doesn't believe in abortion. Tamesha Means, 30, of Muskegon, with the help of the American Civil Liberties Union filed a lawsuit Friday against the United States Conference of Catholic Bishops regarding treatment she allegedly received at Mercy Health Partners hospital in December 2010. Then 27, the suit claims Means visited the hospital - the only one in her county - three times after her water broke some five months early. Mercy Health Partners is part of Trinity Health, a Catholic-run medical group that prohibits abortion in its hospitals. - By HELEN POW
Update: A Catholic hospital has argued in a wrongful death lawsuit that a fetus is not a person. Just let that sink in for a moment.

A beautiful woman has died in agony in the service of a Catholic dogma. A dogma that the Roman Catholic Church itself was willing to repudiate . . . for money. She was not a Catholic. She miscarried and made the mistake of going to a Catholic hospital.

My indignation response has been triggered so often of late that I cannot feel indignation anymore. This scares me. I am beyond wanting to hurt Forced Birthers. I am likely to stomp somebody. The State of Ohio is working on passing an abortion law just like the Irish law that killed this beautiful woman.

I need to go and find a nice safe place to decompress. Someplace where I will not be hurt for being a female. I just do not know where that place might be.
It’s time to abort the Catholic Church
Bloody butchers and pious toads who mask their medieval ignorance with a pretense of charity and care; it’s long past time to end the illusion and recognize the barbarism of the church. Shut ‘em down.
The latest victim in over a millennium of Catholic abuse is Savita Halappanavar, a young woman who was 17 weeks pregnant when her condition began to deteriorate. She went to a Catholic hospital, a fatal mistake.
Rest in Peace, Ms. Savita. I pray that you are the last woman who dies because of the depraved indifference of a nation (Ireland), the Roman Catholic Church and the Morals Police simply because you are a woman.

Thursday, November 21, 2013

The Eyes of Texas - Political Signs - November 2013

The eyes of Texas are upon you
All the live long days
The eyes of Texas are upon you
And you cannot get away.
- Roy Orbison
I almost let November slip by without selecting the Signs of the Month. This month it is all about Wendy Davis. Seems her run for Governor in Texas has captured the public imagination.











Tuesday, November 19, 2013

Suits making a list, they checking it twice, NOW they know who is naughty or nice. Black Helicopters coming to town. - UPDATE

I wrote about lack of sexual privacy and cheerful voyeurism in America before. The situation has degenerated. The Gummint is listening and watching and reading and recording everything you do. And storing it all for future viewing pleasure.

Just let that sink in fully. They know about my Black Leather Dildo and the Large Mammaries. What do they know about YOU? 

Not to worry. Them Suits and Nerds knowing about my Dildo keeps us all FREE. The Patriot Act makes us free! It keeps us safe. Right? 

I have lingering doubts. My question is: 
Why should the Government get to peek for free? I think we need Revolution a la Groucho. Even Hippies understood the rules. "Gas, grass or ass. Nobody rides for free." Reciprocity makes the world go round. 

I have a plan. We must include the Government in our conversations. Include the Government in our public and private intercourse. Give our Government a place in our family. And think real American values: Every man a profit center. 

Write manifestos. Create scenarios. Get a webcam. Shit, get a video camera and a spotlight. Picture this: 

Scene 1: Somewhere on a rooftop in New York City with spotlight and speakers. 
"I am going to do you tonight, Baby. So hard and so loud. And I am going to leave the cell phone ON.
Oh Suits, it turns us on you listening. Do you feel me. Can you hear the Santorum dripping down my leg? Can you see the slap, slap, tickle? Does it feel good for you too?
Tiffany scream! Scream loud. Rock me, Baby.  They flying over us now!
Screams: I want to go to Miami! 
Send the Satellite by, we are on the roof with champagne, a bullwhip and Vivaldi."
Once they come tuning in or flying by, we send them a bill for the experience. Or we shoot them with paint balls and silly string and film them when they send Swat back at us. Bet we could sell that video to Al Jazeera. Be one big diverse madcap Universe of Hubris, KY, Videotape and Bullets. Oh fuck me now!


UPDATE: Curiouser and curiouser. 
NSA About Attorney-Client Privilege Concerns: We'll Probably Grab Your Communications But We'll Try Not To 'Listen In'
A couple of weeks back we covered the American Bar Association asking for assurance from the NSA that attorney-client communications, even those involving foreign clients, would remain out of the agency's reach. This was prompted by a leak that showed the NSA had given an Australian intelligence agency the go-ahead to intercept communications between a US law firm and its Indonesian clients.

UPDATE: 
 "WASHINGTON, Aug 5 (Reuters) - A secretive U.S. Drug Enforcement Administration unit is funneling information from intelligence intercepts, wiretaps, informants and a massive database of telephone records to authorities across the nation to help them launch criminal investigations of Americans".
defense attorney is suing the National Security Agency for phone records in a criminal caseUS vs. Terrance Brown. It had to happen.  Fricking Karma. Thank you, Snowden. All by yourself you neutered the Spyboys and the Suits.

Do I think this will make the Spyboys stop haunting us? Hell no. Humans perseverate. 

Now the Suits and NSA may have to produce all these facts for the defense in criminal cases? If so, thank you doG. It is the 21st century jobs program -  finally here - and the lawyers did it. 

The battle over this is going to be a hoot. Think of the clerks involved alone. Did I say clerks? Think Scribes. Back to the past. Hand written letters and Secret Couriers are back. 

Monday, November 18, 2013

Fallen Fruit Park with Update: Neighborhood Infusions


UPDATE: I did more research about Fallen Fruit artists cooperative. I think the ongoing INFUSIONS project is fascinating. It is a new frontier for this Community Artist.
An ongoing project by Fallen Fruit, in collaboration with Greenbar collective organic distillery in which we pick the fruit we find on a certain street or locale, infuse it in vodka, and name it for the neighborhood.  We’re interested in the essence of that place, to think about its unique qualities but also look at it as a template for creating more livable and individualized neighborhoods. The question Neighborhood Infusions asks is tinged with irony: can you capture the essence of a place in a bottle?  The work is served off the wall by docents (rather than bartenders), who take time to interpret its implications for those interested in consuming it.

I found the City Farmer News website. It seems to be The Blog about urban farming. Those with an interest must go there. I found this new work of art there - a Fruit Park. I have been envisioning turning the many pocket parks in Philadelphia into mini fruit farms. I cheered when I saw that I am not alone in my thinking, planning, plotting ...

Grand Opening On Saturday, January 5, 2013 At Del Aire Park
Press Release
Dec 26, 2012
The trees were planted with the support of the Los Angeles County Arts Commission Civic Art Program and the guidance of Fallen Fruit, an artists’ collaborative founded by David Burns, Matias Viegener and Austin Young, whose mission is to unite communities through the creation of sustainable public art projects. Del Aire residents planted 27 fruit trees, eight grape vines, more than 60 trees were given away to neighbors. Once the trees bear fruit, all park visitors will be encouraged to pick from the new edible landscape at harvest time. Within three years, the trees are expected to be completely sustainable and drought tolerant.
The Fruit Park, which was funded through a creative use of county civic art dollars, is part of a larger plan by Chairman Ridley-Thomas to see community gardens planted in every unincorporated area in the Second District. So far, new gardens have been established in Florence-Firestone and Lennox, and locations and funding have been identified for gardens planned for Willowbrook, Athens and Baldwin Hills.

Friday, November 15, 2013

Asshats on Parade - Would you let this guy date your daughter? With Music.

Are you dateable? Take a test and find out. I failed miserably. I do not know how to shut up. Or be mysterious. And I never follow the rules. What fun is that? This guy is a "Christian motivational speaker." I kind of cringe inside when I contemplate that. 
"Richardson High Schoolers Learned Today That "Dateable Girls Know How to Shut Up"
 By Lauren Smart
Around 1 p.m. today, the hashtag #lookadouche showed up on the Twittersphere. A group of students at Richardson High School were skipping regularly scheduled math or science classes to attend an optional PTA-sponsored assembly.

The day's guest speaker was a motivational speaker who has co-authored faith-based dating books, Dateable: are you? are they? and The Dateable Rules. His name: Justin Lookadoo."



Saturday, November 9, 2013

Asshats on Parade - Out of My Cold Dead Hand Edition


"And when you pray, you shall not be like the hypocrites. For they love to pray standing in the synagogues and on the corners of the streets, that they may be seen by men. Assuredly, I say to you, they have their reward." - Matthew 6:5
I am at a loss for words. So I will just show you the campaign ad. Jesus please save us from your followers.

It seems South Dakota is giving Texas and Kansas a run for first place in the Craziest State in the Union Race. I do not care what this woman has to say. You wave a gun in my face and any conversation we might be having is over.


And if you think I am being unreasonable in rejecting this woman outright, I ask you: how crazy is this event below? Pretty fricking crazy. It is enough to make you want to stay home altogether.

After intimidating four women and all the restaurant patrons and employees for two hours, the gunNuts adjourned to the local Hooters. Family values anyone? What would Jesus do? 

40 Armed Gun Advocates Intimidate Mothers Against Gun Violence In A Restaurant Parking Lot ...click here for more


"Probably about 20 to 25 percent of the adult American population is so right-wing authoritarian, so scared, so self-righteous, so ill-informed, and so dogmatic that nothing you can say or do will change their minds. They would march America into a dictatorship and probably feel that things had improved as a result. … And they are so submissive to their leaders that they will believe and do virtually anything they are told. They are not going to let up and they are not going away." - Robert Altemeyer, The Authoritarians

Wednesday, October 30, 2013

Dirty Tricks or Treat

Self Portrait John Darkow
I follow the Cagle Post. I am a member so they send me cartoons. You can join too. My pet cartoonist there is John Darkow. He is the editorial cartoonist for the Columbia Daily Tribune. This one tickled me. See another one of his sardonic cartoons HERE:



Tuesday, October 29, 2013

Queer Nation Confronts Russian Business Leaders

It is a lovely thing to watch folks speak truth to power. Go Queer Nation! Thank you, Scott Wooledge, for all you do to keep us informed.

Go here for the story of the Rainbow Flag. 

Keep laughing, Russians. You are making Putin look like an ass. No matter what he does now, the world will be laughing at him. I do not think he enjoys that. Welcome to New York City.






Thursday, October 24, 2013

Turkey Crack-Up

I found this in F. Scott Fitzgerald’s 1945 collection of essays, notebook excerpts, and letters, The Crack-Up

TURKEY REMAINS AND HOW TO INTER THEM WITH NUMEROUS SCARCE RECIPES

At this post holiday season, the refrigerators of the nation are overstuffed with large masses of turkey, the sight of which is calculated to give an adult an attack of dizziness. It seems, therefore, an appropriate time to give the owners the benefit of my experience as an old gourmet, in using this surplus material. Some of the recipes have been in my family for generations. (This usually occurs when rigor mortis sets in.) They were collected over years, from old cook books, yellowed diaries of the Pilgrim Fathers, mail order catalogues, golf-bags and trash cans. Not one but has been tried and proven — there are headstones all over America to testify to the fact.

Very well then. Here goes:

Turkey Cocktail: To one large turkey add one gallon of vermouth and a demijohn of angostura bitters. Shake.

Turkey à la Francais: Take a large ripe turkey, prepare as for basting and stuff with old watches and chains and monkey meat. Proceed as with cottage pudding.

Turkey and Water: Take one turkey and one pan of water. Heat the latter to the boiling point and then put in the refrigerator. When it has jelled, drown the turkey in it. Eat. In preparing this recipe it is best to have a few ham sandwiches around in case things go wrong.

Turkey Mongole: Take three butts of salami and a large turkey skeleton, from which the feathers and natural stuffing have been removed. Lay them out on the table and call up some Mongole in the neighborhood to tell you how to proceed from there.

Turkey Mousse: Seed a large prone turkey, being careful to remove the bones, flesh, fins, gravy, etc. Blow up with a bicycle pump. Mount in becoming style and hang in the front hall.

Stolen Turkey: Walk quickly from the market, and, if accosted, remark with a laugh that it had just flown into your arms and you hadn’t noticed it. Then drop the turkey with the white of one egg—well, anyhow, beat it.

Turkey à la Crême: Prepare the crême a day in advance. Deluge the turkey with it and cook for six days over a blast furnace. Wrap in fly paper and serve.

Turkey Hash: This is the delight of all connoisseurs of the holiday beast, but few understand how really to prepare it. Like a lobster, it must be plunged alive into boiling water, until it becomes bright red or purple or something, and then before the color fades, placed quickly in a washing machine and allowed to stew in its own gore as it is whirled around. Only then is it ready for hash. To hash, take a large sharp tool like a nail-file or, if none is handy, a bayonet will serve the purpose—and then get at it! Hash it well! Bind the remains with dental floss and serve.

Feathered Turkey: To prepare this, a turkey is necessary and a one pounder cannon to compel anyone to eat it. Broil the feathers and stuff with sage-brush, old clothes, almost anything you can dig up. Then sit down and simmer. The feathers are to be eaten like artichokes (and this is not to be confused with the old Roman custom of tickling the throat.)

Turkey à la Maryland: Take a plump turkey to a barber’s and have him shaved, or if a female bird, given a facial and a water wave. Then, before killing him, stuff with old newspapers and put him to roost. He can then be served hot or raw, usually with a thick gravy of mineral oil and rubbing alcohol. (Note: This recipe was given me by an old black mammy.)

Turkey Remnant: This is one of the most useful recipes for, though not, “chic,” it tells what to do with the turkey after the holiday, and how to extract the most value from it. Take the remnants, or, if they have been consumed, take the various plates on which the turkey or its parts have rested and stew them for two hours in milk of magnesia. Stuff with moth-balls.

Turkey with Whiskey Sauce: This recipe is for a party of four. Obtain a gallon of whiskey, and allow it to age for several hours. Then serve, allowing one quart for each guest. The next day the turkey should be added, little by little, constantly stirring and basting.

For Weddings or Funerals: Obtain a gross of small white boxes such as are used for bride’s cake. Cut the turkey into small squares, roast, stuff, kill, boil, bake and allow to skewer. Now we are ready to begin. Fill each box with a quantity of soup stock and pile in a handy place. As the liquid elapses, the prepared turkey is added until the guests arrive. The boxes delicately tied with white ribbons are then placed in the handbags of the ladies, or in the men’s side pockets.

There I guess that’s enough turkey talk. I hope I’ll never see or hear of another until—well, until next year..




Monday, October 21, 2013

Cooking with Uncle Sam - Vintage Food Posters and Food Art

I found this glorious WEBSITE for Foodys and those who appreciate graphic arts, history and political posters. I tell you, there are treasures there. Just hit the Preview buttons and enjoy.
"Food. We love it, fear it, and obsess about it.
We demand that our Government ensure that it is safe, cheap, and abundant. In response, Government has been a factor in the production, regulation, research, innovation, and economics of our food supply. It has also attempted, with varying success, to change the eating habits of Americans.

From the farm to the dinner table, explore the records of the National Archives that trace the Government’s effect on what Americans eat."







Friday, October 18, 2013

Wild Socks

UPDATE: You can own this pair of President George H. W. Bush's socks:
PORTLAND, Maine -- PORTLAND, Maine (AP) — Former President George H.W. Bush says his wife is getting fed up with his flashy socks, so he's donated an exceptional pair of bright, cactus-themed socks to a church fundraiser.

I have always loved wild socks. My lucky socks have tropical fish on them. I have socks with stars, giraffes, chili peppers, horses, comets and ice cream cones in color palettes both staid and iridescent. I have paisley socks.

I was especially gratified to see that I am not alone. President George H.W. Bush also knows that crazy socks are the height of sartorial splendor. Is this a plug for crazy socks? Yes.

Click *here* to send the President a picture of your crazy socks to celebrate his birthday. I cannot think of any better way to show President Bush our affection and esteem. Or a better way to welcome a new advertiser Ozone Socks. 


"This post was created in partnership with eAccountable. All opinions are my own."

Monday, October 14, 2013

SuperBugs in Our Food?

“If we are not careful, we will soon be in a post-antibiotic era,” Dr. Tom Frieden, the CDC’s director, said in a media briefing. “And for some patients and for some microbes, we are already there.”
Some very bad bacteria have developed resistance to antibiotics. The Center for Disease Control has released a new report Antibiotic Resistance Threats in the United States 2013.

A number of these antibiotic resistant bacteria result in food borne illnesses. Antibiotic use in food animals can result in resistant bacteria, Campylobacter for example, that can spread to humans through the food we eat. Remember what Mom told you: Wash your hands! Wash your hands!

The CDC warns us:
The use of antibiotics is the single most important factor leading to antibiotic resistance around the world . Antibiotics are among the most commonly prescribed drugs used in human medicine. However, up to 50% of all the antibiotics prescribed for people are not needed or are not optimally effective as prescribed .
Antibiotics are also commonly used in food animals to prevent, control, and treat disease, and to promote the growth of food-producing animals . The use of antibiotics for promoting growth is not necessary, and the practice should be phased out . Recent guidance from the U .S . Food and Drug Administration (FDA) describes a pathway toward this goal.
It is difficult to directly compare the amount of drugs used in food animals with the amount used in humans, but there is evidence that more antibiotics are used in food production . 
What can you do to help with this serious health concern? The CDC answers many questions HERE. One way, and an increasing popular way to protect yourself and your community from antibiotic resistance, is to become a Vegetarian and/or reduce your consumption of commercially produced meat. The money quotation from the article:

Q: How can I prevent antibiotic-resistant infections?

Only use antibiotics when they are likely to be beneficial
A: By visiting this website, you are taking the first step to reducing your risk of getting antibiotic-resistant infections. It is important to understand that, although they are very useful drugs, antibiotics designed for bacterial infections are not useful for viral infections such as a cold, cough, or the flu. Some useful tips to remember are:
  1. Talk with your healthcare provider about antibiotic resistance:
    • Ask whether an antibiotic is likely to be beneficial for your illness
    • Ask what else you can do to feel better sooner
  2. Do not take an antibiotic for a viral infection like a cold or the flu.
  3. Do not save some of your antibiotic for the next time you get sick. Discard any leftover medication once you have completed your prescribed course of treatment.
  4. Take an antibiotic exactly as the healthcare provider tells you. Do not skip doses. Complete the prescribed course of treatment even if you are feeling better. If treatment stops too soon, some bacteria may survive and re-infect.
  5. Do not take antibiotics prescribed for someone else. The antibiotic may not be appropriate for your illness. Taking the wrong medicine may delay correct treatment and allow bacteria to multiply.
  6. If your healthcare provider determines that you do not have a bacterial infection, ask about ways to help relieve your symptoms. Do not pressure your provider to prescribe an antibiotic.

Friday, October 11, 2013

Occupy Oakland 2nd Anniversary Poster


The struggle continues. Now do not let that word "struggle" intimidate you. If you fear and loathe Congress, there is a painless way to strike a blow for truth, justice and the American Way. 

You do not have to camp out with Occupy and sleep on the ground to get your message out. I am a Holiday Inn kind of girl myself. You can do your part and never have take off your pink marabou slippers or put down your martini.