Friday, September 19, 2014

The Penis and the Gun or This is for Fighting and This is for Fun

There are a number of websites that are tracking 'accidental' gun wounding and gun death. These stories, especially the stories about the dead toddlers, used to upset me. You can read another new gun death story every day in America. For awhile I was in a constant state of upset. 

The whole American gun debacle is so ugly, ridiculous and constant that all I can do now is laugh. Do you think maybe God has a sense of humor?

BANG - right in the penis! And the Dumfuckistanis do it to themselves regularly. Oh the schadenfreude - it is delicious. This comedian below is so right on.
1. A man in Macon Georgia shot himself in the penis on Thursday, according to WMAZ Channel 13.
 2. CHANDLER, Ariz. – Police are preaching firearms safety after a Chandler man accidentally shot himself in the penis with his girlfriend's little pink pistol.
 3. Police in the town of Rio Claro received a call around 8:00 a.m. on Sunday from witnesses who had heard a shot coming from a parked car. The responding officers found a driver slumped at the wheel bleeding from his... private parts.
I could go on and on and on ... but you get the idea. "His girlfriend's little pink pistol" got him right in his little pink pistol. LAUGHING MY ASS OFF.

Sunday, September 14, 2014

Corpse Fingers and Chicken Wire Ghosts

Every year I collect creative and amusing ways to decorate for Halloween and recipes for Halloween food. It is my favorite holiday.

The decorations this year are so witty. They have the added advantages of

1. not filling landfills with garbage that is not biodegradable

2. and they are inexpensive to make because they are easy do-it-yourself from ordinary materials you might even have around the house.

Enjoy. Happy Halloween! 

Wacky Archives has directions for making ghostly figures that you can reuse every year. And the commenters have scary refinements.

Click the picture and learn how to make Mummy Dogs, Spider Web Soup and Corpse Fingers.

I can just about hear you and your children laughing while you make this Sick Pumpkin. Easy directions from Can Do Kids Crafts. 

Saturday, September 13, 2014

Bob Crewe Dies at 82.

Bob Crewe is responsible for so much of the greatest American popular music. 

I will be singing his songs and dancing to them until I can dance and sing no more. 

Rest in peace and music. 

Another great song. My daughter Lu just said that she cannot stand more than one song with Frankie Valli. Luscious Lulu says he sounds like Sinatra with no nuts. And she spends the whole second song hoping his testicles will descend. Apple do not fall far from the tree. 

Thursday, September 11, 2014

Asshats on Parade - GoGo Girl Diplomacy or TaTas for Freedumb

Click Me!
UPDATE: "Don't you know who I am?"
Tundra Tart and the Wasillabillies were involved in a drunken brawl in Alaska. 
“The owner of the house gets involved, and he probably wished he hadn’t,” Coyne continued. “At this point, he’s up against nearly the whole Palin tribe: Palin women screaming. Palin men thumping their chests. Word is that Bristol has a particularly strong right hook, which she employed repeatedly, and it’s something to hear when Sarah screams, ‘Don’t you know who I am!’ And it was particularly wonderful when someone in the crowd screamed back, ‘This isn’t some damned Hillbilly reality show!’ - Amanda Coyne
The object of persecution is persecution. The object of torture is torture. The object of power is power. Now do you begin to understand me? - George Orwell 1984

Christian my sweet petunia. This woman is sober?

There used to be a photograph of a Sarah Palin poop flag on the Net. It seems to have been removed. This will have to do for now. Where is Martin Bashir now that we need him?

And fuck you, John McCain. Fuck you for inflicting this bimbo on America. This cheap slut was meant to be VP of the United States of America? Can she even spell America?

Senile old fool McCain voted with his dick for this Koch-sucking-meth-addicted-secessionist Bimbo Queen of the Universe. And fuck any advertiser who quits me because I said this.

As you know, cher Reader, it takes a lot ot gross me out. Bad taste is my middle name. Torture as Christian baptism freaked me bigtime. I cannot find filthy enough language to express my revulsion. And I am a trashmouth with talent.

Wednesday, September 10, 2014

Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster

Click Me!
Give us this day our daily Pasta. And deliver us from spaghetti-Os. For thine is the semolina, the boiling water, and the sauce. 

Yea, though I walk through the Valley of McDonalds, I will fear no McRib, for thou art al dente. Thy sauce and thy cheese they comfort me. Thou sitteth on the table before me in the presence of chianti. My wine glass runneth over.

Surely goodness and linguine shall follow me all the days of my life. And I will dwell with and praise The Flying Spaghetti Monster forever. RAmen.

Penne for your thoughts?

Our first Prophet makes his debut. We are everywhere.

Friday, September 5, 2014

Illegal Abortion in America

In 2014, four decades after the Supreme Court upheld a woman's right to choose, pregnant women once again find themselves crossing the border to Mexico and haunting back-alleys in search of medical care. - Laura Bassett 
I had an epiphany the other day. Roe v. Wade was an attempt to regulate abortion because the abortion situation was entirely out of control in 1970. 
Women were dying in ugly and public ways from illegal abortion. Lots of women. 
Clergy were directing women to safe though still illegal abortion and advertising the abortion referral service in the New York Times. Rest in peace, Reverend Moody. 
NOW was giving parlor teach-ins conducted by nurses to instruct women in the art of 'menstrual extraction' and how to make the device to extract with.
The JANE women's collective was doing safe cheap abortions by the thousands.
Nobody was waiting for the government to approve abortion. And there was absolutely no control at all. Everybody was doing illegal abortions - the Mafia, your local Nurse moonlighting, doctors with a conscience, etc. It was a Vonnegut style circus.
All by themselves, screaming they are moral, the forced birth cultists have deregulated abortion in America. The back alley abortion is back. There will be no regulations for safety or time limits on when a woman can abort. Gosnell City is here. And the 'pro lifers' built it. 

I would be laughing my ass off except I remember what it was like the last time abortion was illegal. My teen Sister self aborted with quinine. Even my Catholic Mother got an illegal abortion. We could have lost her. I know someone who lost her Mother at age 9 to unregulated illegal abortion. 

How many women will get maimed or die this time around the block? How many women will go to jail and leave their children to foster care? How many peaches will you get if you harm the tree? If you think I exaggerate, familiarize yourself with recent events in my backward state of Pennsylvania:

America's Law Enforcement Problem

Click Me!
I found this excellent essay on law enforcement on Crooks and Liars. It was just hanging out in the comments. The author, Bill Allyn, has posted it on a number of online sites. I hope I can help his comments go viral by publishing them here. I think he covers all the bases. 

"America has a serious, institutionalized, systemic law enforcement problem. Over the last 4 decades, our law enforcement has become increasingly militarized, putting every citizen at risk of being shot and killed for nothing more than reaching for their wallet, as instructed, or less. This may increase safety for police officers (debatable, in the long run), but at the expense of making American citizens far less safe, which is the exact opposite of the goals of law enforcement. We need to create systems that bring back accountability within every level of the justice system.

Nationally, we need to:

1. Create citizen oversight committees with powers of subpoena and prosecutorial discretion for every law enforcement agency in the country. 

2. Require law enforcement officers to be personally insured to protect taxpayers from lawsuits. Too risky for insurance? No insurance, no badge. 

3. Require every law enforcement officer to wear a camera. No camera, no gun. No exceptions. 

4. Require yearly psyche tests and lie detector tests to screen out bad apples. 

5. Require monthly drug and steroid tests.

6. All police agencies must keep a database of every officer-caused civilian injury, shooting or killing, and that data must be periodically transmitted to a third-party, non-biased national database. 

7. Any officer involved in a shooting must be alcohol and drug tested immediately.

8. Officers should be made aware of studies on abuse of power, such as the Stanford Prison Experiment and the Milgram experiment on obedience to authority figures.

9. Create a special number to report police brutality. 

10. Create national database of bad cops, so they don’t just get hired elsewhere.

11. Reverse militarization of police forces. Take away military “toys”, weapons, APC's, uniforms, etc. Keep SWAT/military weapons and equipment under lock and key only to be used in genuine emergencies.

12. End drug prohibition/war on drugs. Use harm reduction strategies. 

13. End private prison industry. 

14. Create a national organization dedicated to these ideals,"

Tuesday, September 2, 2014

Ms. Mary Walker's Green Tomato Chutney

I know that I am not the only gardener in Pennsylvania gazing at a bumper crop of tomatoes. Ms. Walker has been kind enough to share her recipe for Green Tomato Chutney with me.

You can learn more about Ms. Walker, British expatriate HERE. 
Unconditional surrender of Europe occurred on my 11th birthday and, in the evening my dad suggested that we ‘go for a walk’. My sister warned that we would be late for the curfew. My Dad simply answered – “It’s such a nice evening, I don’t think we’re going to worry about that tonight”. Cat’s Whisker receivers WORKED! 
Mi casa es su casa. So I am sharing with you, Cher Reader. I give it to you as she gave it to me. Stay tuned for her recipe for Garlic Jam. When Ms. Mary said Garlic Jam, I began to salivate immediately.


5 lbs chopped green tomatoes
1 lb chopped onions
1 tsp whole peppercorns
1 tsp salt
1 lb sugar
1-1/2 cups vinegar (I use either white wine vinegar or cider vinegar)
1/4 cup raisins
1/4 cup sultanas

Mix tomatoes, onions and peppercorns in a large bowl and let sit overnight (covered)
Bring vinegar and sugar to a boil (until sugar is melted) 
Add sultanas and raisins and simmer for 5 minutes
Add tomatoes and onion mixture and simmer till thick (about 40 to 45 minutes).
Put into 8 oz jars - leaving about 1/4inch head-space - and can for 15 minutes.

Monday, September 1, 2014

Where is Benjamin Franklin when you need to talk to him? - UPDATE

Democracy is two wolves and a lamb voting on what to have for lunch. Liberty is a well-armed lamb contesting the vote. - Benjamin Franklin 
Military Researchers Develop Corpse-Eating Robots
From the file marked “Evidently, many scientists have never seen even one scary sci-fi movie”: The Defense Department is funding research into battlefield robots that power themselves by eating human corpses. What could possibly go wrong?
If the Atlantic is writing about robots, robot weaponry and other golems, I guess I am not crazy paranoid after all.

If the Robots Kill Us, It's Because It's Their Job

Don't kill us, guys.
Is this a mosquito? 

No. It's an insect spy drone for urban areas, already in production, funded by the US Government. It can be remotely controlled and is equipped with a camera and a microphone. It can land on you, and it may have the potential to take a DNA sample or leave RFID tracking nanotechnology on your skin. It can fly through an open window, or it can attach to your clothing until you take it in your home. 


UPDATE: Nobody read this much. Most folks probably dismissed my concern because they think I am a crackpot.

I am a crackpot. So the only argument I can extend is continuing to provide information. Talk me down. I am scared. The original article I wrote that went relatively unread is below the Sun.

Progress on developing armed robot soldiers is continuing. As this article from WIRED asserts. I do not know what Franklin's concept of "well-armed" could be when we are confronted with such golems.

Killer Robots With Automatic Rifles Could Be on the Battlefield in 5 Years
“They’re not just tools, but members of the squad. That’s the goal,” Lt. Col. Willie Smith, chief of Unmanned Ground Vehicles at Fort Benning told Computerworld. “A robot becoming a member of the squad, we see that as a matter of training.”

Congress is not at all interested in what the American people want. And they have no plans to give us anything we want. That becomes more obvious by the day and the event

And the government (yours and mine) is working on robot soldiers to kill a lot of us when:
    Scott Olsen - Getty Images

  1. climate change produces riots because of famine and lack of potable water everywhere or 
  2. there is an "American Spring." Mass civil rights demonstrations and food riots are so messy. 
Governments are planning to kill you and me only if necessary, of course. And they have the machines to do us now in great numbers. Right now. And they are working on improving them. And they have secret courts who rubber stamp their spying on us. 

So stop with the "lizard people" and "they coming to take our guns, RickyBoy" conspiracy theories and wake up. Just because you are paranoid does not mean no one is following you. Wake the fuck up, World. We all have a big problem. A problem not amenable to retaliatory force. And we cannot solve it if we do not help each other.

Union Made - Dedicated to My Mother - Polka Queen and Member and Officer of the IBEW

Wow, Putin does NOT like protesters, does he? Oh wait, that's McDonald's in Oak Brook, Illinois.
Labor is prior to, and independent of, capital. Capital is only the fruit of labor, and could never have existed if labor had not first existed. Labor is the superior of capital, and deserves much the higher consideration. - Abraham Lincoln

My Mother is Rosie the Riveter. She worked in an aircraft factory during WWII. She would be marching with the Fast Food Workers if she were not 93 and blind in one eye. She was the boss cook of the Sun Ray lunch counter in Trenton NJ for a time. We might have to tie her down to keep her from trying to march.
For my Mom, every day is and was Labor Day.

"Ten thousand times has the labor movement stumbled and fallen and bruised itself, and risen again; been seized by the throat and choked and clubbed into insensibility; enjoined by courts, assaulted by thugs, charged by the militia, shot down by regulars, traduced by the press, frowned upon by public opinion, deceived by politicians, threatened by priests, repudiated by renegades, preyed upon by grafters, infested by spies, deserted by cowards, betrayed by traitors, bled by leeches, and sold out by leaders, but notwithstanding all this, and all these, it is today the most vital and potential power this planet has ever known, and its historic mission of emancipating the workers of the world from the thraldom of the ages is as certain of ultimate realization as is the setting of the sun."  - Eugene Victor Debs, Socialist Party Candidate for POTUS, "An Ideal Labor Press," The Metal Worker (May 1904)

I am not a Labor Leader; I do not want you to follow me or anyone else; if you are looking for a Moses to lead you out of this capitalist wilderness, you will stay right where you are. I would not lead you into the promised land if I could, because if I led you in, some one else would lead you out. You must use your heads as well as your hands, and get yourself out of your present condition; as it is now the capitalists use your heads and your hands.
As quoted in "Life of Eugene V. Debs" by Stephen Marion Reynolds, in Debs : His Life, Writings and Speeches (1908) edited by Bruce Rogers and Stephen Marion Reynolds, p. 71

Labor Day Hoorah!

I honor my Mother and her Friends
 who were members and officers in their chapter of the 
International Brotherhood of Electrical Workers

"Labor is prior to, and independent of, capital. Capital is only the fruit of labor, and could never have existed if labor had not first existed. Labor is the superior of capital, and deserves much the higher consideration." 
Lincoln's First Annual Message to Congress, December 3, 1861.

Eleanor Roosevel addresses striking IBEW workers in 1941

Sunday, August 31, 2014

Signs of the Month - September 2014 - FUCK THE POLICE !

This post has musical accompaniment. See below. 

Look sharp below for the graffiti poster's sign. It is not immediately evident. The guns kind of get in the way. 

Off the Pigs! 

I have not had occasion to say that since the 1968 Chicago riots. Feels good. Real good. 

Thursday, August 28, 2014

Catcall This! - Artists Give Me Such A Woody # 2

I found a new political cartoonist. Go to Angry Girl Comics for more from this new to me cartoonist Wendy M. Xu. I must give credit where credit is due: some of the most thought provoking and startling images on the Internet can be found at sexgenderbody. For grownups only.

Tuesday, August 26, 2014

Uppity Texans Unite. Go Texas!

Below you can read a long and earnest Manifesto from 

They are ambitiious. They are raising Hell in Texas as I type. I thought Texas was Hell. I think somebody famous said that. 

I support the abortion platform. I stop at the 'ending pornography' part. That is a little too bluestocking for trashmouth old Me. I like to look at dirty pictures. So sue me. 
If nothing changes, on September 1st all but six abortion clinics in Texas will be closed (there were 46 in 2011).
Women will begin dying from dangerous illegal abortions. Others will be imprisoned for self-inducing abortions. Thousands more will have their lives foreclosed by being forced to bear children they do not want – shattering their dreams, trapping them in abusive relationships, and/or driving them into humiliating and dangerous poverty. Rural, poor, immigrant, and women of color will be hardest hit.
Worse, this emergency in Texas is not an isolated problem.
Hundreds of abortion restrictions have been enacted in recent years. Six states have only one abortion clinic left. Eight abortion doctors and staff have been murdered. Countless women have been shamed and humiliated.
Those driving this attack on women's most fundamental rights are deadly serious. They will not stop until all abortions have been criminalized forall women in all circumstances.
THIS MUST NOT BE ALLOWED! Forcing women to have children against their will is a form of enslavement.
Courageous people are doing important work to keep abortion available. At the same time, it must be confronted soberly: much more is needed.
What happens this summer in Texas will affect women everywhere. It is the responsibility of everyone who does not want to see women forced to have children against their will to stand up and fight. Not some time in the future, but now.
This is a time for courage. For people to defy fear, to shatter silence, and to break their isolation. To refuse to wait for politicians or courts to make our will known. To raise our voices and fill the streets, to make art and wage protest, to defend doctors and assist women, to change hearts and enlighten minds. To engage in acts of militant non-violent direct action. To call forth thousands and soon millions until we have STOPPED these attacks and DEFEATED this war on women.
We reject the view that a woman's highest purpose is to bear children. Women are full human beings with the moral, ethical and legal right to decide when and whether to be mothers.
NO MORE women denied the right to dream, the right to live full lives, the right to love, the right to decide for themselves. WE WILL RESIST!

Sunday, August 24, 2014

ZOMG. I am in LOVE.

This is what funding abortion looks like. Handsome man of the Cowboy Nerd persuasion and Banana his Cat. I want them both with a purple passion. I have always wanted to do twins. Take the Drink a Beer and Eat a Taco and Fund Abortion Challenge.

In Philadelphia and Pennsylvania, send a contribution to Women's Medical Fund. 

Hold Up, So How Does This Work?

You find yourself a fucking taco, or a fucking beer, or a fucking taco and a beer, then you eat the fucking taco or drink the fucking beer or eat and drink both the fucking taco and the beer, and then you donate some money to an abortion fund. You fucking film yourself doing this shit and then you send us the fucking video and we put it on the fucking internet.

Friday, August 22, 2014

"Use a picture. It's worth a thousand words." - Arthur Brisbane

Go HERE for more. Just keep scrolling. All kinds of good stuff. 

Have a taco or drink a beer and fund abortion. Works for me.

I am never going to pour ice on myself. Never. I hate COLD.

I love tacos and beer. And I got an extra few bucks. I can do this. Margarita's Restaurant here I come.

Eat a taco or drink a beer. Make a video and send a donation to help women. Now that is win-win.

Kudos to the confident and generous prochoice men in the videos. The sexiest man in the world is a prochoice man. See more photographs and videos at the tumblr site or at #tacoorbeerchallenge. 

Hold Up, So How Does This Work?

You find yourself a fucking taco, or a fucking beer, or a fucking taco and a beer, then you eat the fucking taco or drink the fucking beer or eat and drink both the fucking taco and the beer, and then you donate some money to an abortion fund. You fucking film yourself doing this shit and then you send us the fucking video and we put it on the fucking internet.

A Note From The Founders

Dear Concerned “Pro-Life” Folks,
A number of you have written into the #TacoOrBeerChallenge tumblr with the suggestion that theChallenge’s founder “abort” herself. This proposal has been further explored and expounded upon on Twitter by a particularly vocal and especially thoughtful group of erudite individuals.
The Taco Or Beer Challenge has taken your proposal under advisement, but the Taco Or Beer Challenge regrets to inform you that it will not be implemented at this time. Thank you so much for your helpful input and your powerful witness in the light of the glory of Jesus Christ.
The Taco Or Beer Challenge

Friday, August 15, 2014

Cat Duet - A New Song - Attitude Adjustment

I love cats. Lizzy of the Viper Girls says I am a 'crazy cat lady.' I take issue with the 'crazy' part. Some children have no manners.

Time for some attitude adjustment. This duet is a tour de force. I found it on JoeMyGod. Enjoy.

Wednesday, August 13, 2014

"Are they Prostitutes?" asks Baby Saver Servant. - Sexpig of the Month - August 2014

In a fit a black humor, I decided to create a Sexpig of the Month series. Like Zachary Klundt.

I made myself sick with it. It got unfunny and truly scary and disgusting fast. I grossed myself out.

I decided to lay off writing about Sexpigs for awhile for my own mental health. Then I came across this video and I just had to share it. My second female Sexpig. Trigger Warning: video is really creepy.

Baby Saver Servant who produced this video expects to be seen as sane and caring. That expectation is the chief delusion of the Forced Birth Cultists.

Brace yourself. The woman has a higher register than Sarah Palin the Tundra Tart. This is the kind of speech SCOTUS calls 'counseling.'
Last week, Supreme Court Justice Antonin Scalia told us that these people are not anti-abortion “protesters.”  Instead, he glowingly described them as, “counselors” who wanted “to comfort these [pregnant] women” by speaking to them, “quietly and in a friendly manner.” 
- Dean Obeidallah
I call this madness. And I think a federal law to make this activity illegal is needed. Stalking and harassment are crimes. Is this stalking and harassment? You tell me.

I will tell you where it is at for me. I would have all I could do not to give this fetus freak the bitchslapping she so richly deserves. And that is why I am not a clinic escort. Clinic escorts are models of restraint.

Here is the whackjob practicing medicine. 
This is counseling, Fat Tony?

Sunday, August 10, 2014

Equal Time

I posted the editorial cartoon below when two cops were assassinated by homegrown terrorists while eating their lunch.

The cops, who reported on the assassination of their fellow officers in a news video, had stoic faces and tears on their cheeks. Broke my heart.

I think it is time that cops gave some serious thought to their politics and practices. Serious thought.

Friday, August 8, 2014

Fight Hobby Lobby! Be a Sidewalk Counselor! Yo, America. Looking Good!

These protests are taking place everywhere. Just count the updates so far. Women and men of all ages are participating. Clergy are handing out condoms.

The SCOTUS gave us lemons, and we all seem to be busy turning them into lemonade - without the sugar. Pucker up, SCOTUS, this todo is special for you.

UPDATE 4 - Monona Wisconsin had a brass band and the Raging Grannies.

UPDATE 3 - Billings, Montana weighs in. See the slideshow and find out who else showed up.

UPDATE 2 - WILLIAMSVILLE N.Y. (WIVB) - A group of protesters gathered outside the Transit Road Hobby Lobby store Saturday, to show their disappointment with the U.S. Supreme Court’s recent decision in Burwell V. Hobby Lobby.

UPDATE - Protest in Des Moines too!
Hot damn! I love you, my fellow Americans. You rock!

Protesters Swarm Hobby Lobby Grand Opening
"Close to a hundred protesters descended on Hobby Lobby in Burbank Monday, chanting and waving posters, crafting IUDs out of colorful pipe cleaners, and handing out coupons and gift cards to competing craft stores to protest a recent U.S. Supreme Court decision allowing the company to exempt certain (all) contraceptives from employees' medical coverage on religious grounds.
As the craft store celebrated its grand opening, women and men planted themselves outside the store, urging customers to buy their craft goods elsewhere." Read much more at the links.
By Alene Tchekmedyian 

See a slide show with more photos from Burbank
 by Tim Berger HERE. 

Sunday, August 3, 2014

Sign of the Month - August 2014

Gainesville welcomes a new Hobby Lobby store. I had a hard time picking the sign out of the wealth of candidates.

Get the story of the protest and quotes from the protesters from the Gainesville Sun.

And get more photos of the protest HERE. 

Everybody was there. And the signs were clever and creative. Ultimately, the prochoice man with the simple information sign about how to resist the Hobby Lobby decision was my choice. The sexiest man in the world is a pro choice man. See the runners-up below. And see the Satanic Temple for another way to resist. 

Some 90 people join protest against Hobby Lobby
Hobby Lobby's new Gainesville store opened quietly Friday ahead of its official grand opening Monday morning, but it was noisy on the sidewalk outside. Passing cars honked in support of sign-waving protesters who oppose the company's stance on women's contraceptive health care.

Tuesday, July 29, 2014

When was the last time a Philosopher went viral?

Open Carry Texas Activists
Below is an excerpt of A Rational Response to Open Carry Activists written by Philosopher Jack Russell Weinstein that went viral.

You want to read this essay in full and the resulting comments at the source. 
"As most people know, there are activists in Texas who are making a point of going to public places with visible firearms. They have gotten a lot of attention because some chain restaurants and stores have prohibited them from openly carrying their weapons, mostly because it frightens other patrons.
This fear is legitimate. As many have pointed out, there is no way for bystanders to know whether the people with guns are “good guys” or “bad guys.” It is rational to be afraid of someone with a weapon, especially if you know nothing about them.
Furthermore, as Jon Stewart has pointed out better than anyone else, since people are often legally permitted to use guns to protect themselves when they are legitimately afraid for their lives, there is no predicting when someone is going to see the activists and shoot before they ask questions. This will happen. It is just a matter of time. And, in many cases, it will be a legal and rational act. None of us want to be victims of the crossfire.
My proposal is as follows: we should all leave. Immediately. Leave the food on the table in the restaurant. Leave the groceries in the cart, in the aisle. Stop talking or engaging in the exchange. Just leave, unceremoniously, and fast.
But here is the key part: don’t pay. Stopping to pay in the presence of a person with a gun means risking your and your loved ones’ lives; money shouldn’t trump this. It doesn’t matter if you ate the meal. It doesn’t matter if you’ve just received food from the deli counter that can’t be resold. It doesn’t matter if you just got a haircut. Leave. If the business loses money, so be it. They can make the activists pay."

Monday, July 28, 2014

The Practical Limitations of Government or Dance Like It Is 1975

Because I am a women's issues gadfly, I troll the Internet message boards for a chance to argue women's issues. One argument I hear pretty often goes sort of like this: 
"No, you are not in control of your body because The Gummint makes laws about what you can do with it. You can't just take drugs, for example. Or prostitute."
Actually, I can take drugs if I so choose. And I have. I am astounded that anyone thinks The Rules keep people good. It plainly evident that is is humanity's goodness and longing for peace that keeps The Peace of the Rule of Law.

I can choose whatever I want and pay for it. The government has only two responses to behavior it wishes I would not do: prohibition and punishment. These are weak responses in the face of psychoses and/or casual and joyful wrongdoing. How so? Follow me.

I had to have a background check to do a job. I came up with a spotless record. I breathed a sigh of relief because I subscribe to the Rule of Law for the most part, I want my government to be effective and expect it to be, and I thought my Sin would surely find me.

My arrest in 1975 for growing 13 six foot tall marijuana plants in the greenhouse of my country home never showed up. Only time I ever got arrested. Somehow the Police got the idea that my house was the East Coast depot for all the Humboldt County Green. They sent a truck to tow away the marijuana and three squad cars. I was out. They left me note: "Mrs. B, please come on over to the police station." So fully expecting to be slammed into the Pokey, I ambled on over to the station house.

They booked me. I confessed to the Judge so they would let my innocent gardener go. The Russian carpenter living in the basement confessed too.  I plead guilty to Misdemeanor Cultivation of a Controlled Dangerous Substance. Cost me a $175.00 fine. Cops took the plants and the baggie with about a gram in it that belonged to Sergei.

All of this happened because the municipal dog catcher had the hots for me and came round to put the make on me one afternoon. I think, on the whole, that even though I had no house I could see out any window and my nearest neighbor was two miles away, it was a mistake to swim naked in the pool.

Ah, the War on Drugs. The Gummint is not good at "controlling my body." And not good at keeping track of crime and Evildoers like me. Good thing I am not a psychopath and I am sober. Think how much trouble I could get into if I tried, know what I mean? And there are people out there trying every day.

So let us just shed the idea that order is imposed and can be imposed by the government without the cooperation of the people right now. I leave you with these thoughts from Lao Tzu translated by Herrymon Maurer.

Govern the country by regular rules;
Direct the army by cunning moves;
But win the world by avoiding fuss.
How do I know that this is so?
Inward light!

Beneath heaven,
The more rules and prohibitions there are,
The poorer the people become.
The sharper the weapons there are,
The greater the country's confusion.
The cleverer the people become,
The more cunning acts take place.
The more laws and orders there are,
The more thieves and robbers appear.

Therefore the sage says:
I do nothing,
And the people of themselves reform.
I love stillness,
And the people of themselves grow straight.
I don't fuss,
And the people of themselves get rich.
I don't want,
And the people of themselves grow simple.

When the law is dumb dumb,
The people are simple simple.
When the law is smart smart,
The people are broke broke.
Good fortune rests on bad fortune;
Bad fortune hides in good fortune.
Who knows the end of this?

It does not stop:
The normal turns into the odd;
The good turns into the weird.
Long have the people been in a stew!

Therefore the sage is
Severe, but he doesn't cut;
Exact, but he doesn't hurt;
Straight, but he doesn't strain;
Bright, but he doesn't dazzle.