Time Wounds All Heels. Did somebody famous say that? TO BE CONTINUED - I NEED COFFEE.

Graphic by Favianna Rodriguez

Fannie Brice: “Time heals all wounds and wounds all heels.”

I have killed people. God saved me from succeeding. I would tell the story, but in our current civil condition, it would seem more like braggadocio than confession. Lady Shrink and I are talking about rage, mine specifically and otherwise.

I have not been able to write more so I have not come back for awhile. While I was trying to figure out wtf I am doing here, I came across the best depiction of bipolar rage and working class pain I know about. And I discovered that Nina Simone is also bipolar. So I am sharing it to compensate you for this literary interruptus. It is embarrassing but I do not want to tell lies...

Primer on Propaganda for RESISTERS. Go HIGH; Stay HIGH.

This comment appeared on social media. It speaks to my condition.

By bootster

That's what I am hearing as well. The GOP are trying to make it impossible to believe what you read anymore, but the truth is, it's only to be highly doubted by when they are the authors. They are still not convincing the Democrats to do the same thing.

I have noticed a lot of folks on here wanting the Democrats to get to the level of the GOP. That is the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard, but it's only because those particular individuals have the capacity to want to "fight like that".

If I wanted to, I could get down and dirty and start to throw insults at the people who attack me on here, but that's what they want. They want to get me to start the personal attacks so they can point to them, smearing me.

The GOP are doing the same thing. They want the Democrats to go full down and dirty so they can use actual clips of them saying things that no politician should ever say, and then it's GAME OVER for the Democrats.

The GOP OWN the "media", and they would come out the winners if the Democrats ever started to get into the gutter with them. The trolls on here thought that they could ban me by now by luring me into a tit for tat personal assault fest, and that would be a sure way to get myself banned, and that's what they want.

The same tactic is being used by the GOP. They are trying to piss off the liberals to come out and start looking like the cretins that THEY are, but it's not working. We just won't go there. This pardoning of Libby was a direction to get the liberals upset enough that some may break and go to the gutter, and then it's over for them.

The deal here is the the GOP can say any nasty thing they want, and they get away with it, but the Democrats would commit suicide by doing that, so now they are attacking the Democrats for being "weak". The trolls who are constantly complaining that the Democrats are weak are just trying to get them to commit suicide by going to the mat and self destructing in the "media" shortly thereafter.

"First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then they fight you, then you win".
- Mahatma Gandhi

Poster by Mitchell Loeb, 1934. The Jewish Labor Committee, the International Ladies' Garment Workers' Union, the Labor Chest to Combat Nazism and Fascism, and others made use of it in outreach campaigns.

FUCK YEAH! at the Fruits and Nuts Cafe

WPA Poster

Okay. I cannot write much. I need medication. First, Lady Shrink said so. Then my Black Sister told me I cannot even have phone conversation without saying "I have to leave now." My mind is going 150 miles an hour.

There is no end to my desire to prove I am not really crazy. I am just bad. Calling the doctor today. Thought I was 'handling it.'

All I have got is a sentence published by Dave Weigel who is the only genuine Conservative I know. I miss real Conservatives. 

My brain keeps returning to the sentence “a transgender heavy metal singer defeated the author of Virginia’s anti-trans bathroom bill." - Dave W.

Danica Roems's triumph is kind of amazing. I think she won because of 'the content of her character.' And that is a good thing. And now for a rapid change of focus. Hard to concentrate on one thing when manic.

Right Wing Argument - or - How many times have you met one of these intellects on the Net?

Those who shove millions of people into a set (the left), and assert each and every person in the set holds the same ideas and opinions, can be broken into two groups:

1. Authoritarian followers.
2. Paid disINFObots, Russian or otherwise, whose job it is to create class/race/group chaos and hatred to disable democracies.

Both classes of posters are not capable or worthy of conversation/discussion. They are Shitweasels.

Shitweasel Method of Argument:
When the facts do not serve, argue motive and impugn character.

Shitweasel Method of Argument 2:
And this is a favorite. Misquote your opponent and then go on to impugn character and motives of opponent and/or sources. The 1-2 Method.

Once you notice the ubiquity of these methods of argument, you will be LOLing so hard you cannot get pissed at shitweasel trolls. Takes all troll jollies away.

I have reached PEAK RAGE.

Rage. Not a good thing for a bipolar person. Not good for me. Not good for others. Steve Scalise got shot by one of my brethren in a rage reaction. Rage is starting to leak through into my online communication. Embarrassing. And I do not want the Secret Service to have any need at all to meet me. 

I ran my second husband over with a Volkswagen. I say that onstage and get an instant laugh. I chased him. Luckily he saw a ditch and jumped in it. The wheels of the car rolled right over him. The ditch was low and narrow enough to save him. God saved me or I might still be in jail. I was beautiful so the fool married me anyway. I ask you: Who was the craziest one?

Why am I confessing? I read a letter from which I quote this excerpt:

Mr. Trump’s speech and actions demonstrate an inability to tolerate views different from his own, leading to rage reactions. 

Then I read this article. I found I am part of a "devastating crisis in mental health." Do tell.

I only had a Volkswagen to drive when I had one of my numerous rage reactions. The Scalise shooter had a gun. Donald Trump has nuclear weapons. And in your guts, you know he is nuts.

Melancholia Agitata

Melancholia Agitata is what I am suffering through used to be called. I cannot sleep. I am voraciously restless and living in a well of darkness at once. I have been through this before. It ruins my relationships, my work, everything goes kablooey. I never know when it is going to happen. I lost jobs. I lost people. I lost homes.

I will get to talk to Lady Shrink today in the afternoon and that is good.

I do not want to scare anybody. This is not a complaint. It is just a description. I am out of the closet with my crazy. More than anything I want to be understood. It has taken me years to come to terms with my illness. I preferred for a long time to think of myself as bad. You can do something about bad. What can you do with nutz?

A good thing to read if you know somebody like me is Touched with Fire: Manic-Depressive Illness and the Artistic Temperament by the American psychologist Kay Redfield Jamison. She examines the relationship between bipolar disorder and artistic creativity. 

A study was done which looked at 12 successful Comedians. The parameters were 1. actively working and 2. had earnings of at least $500,000.00 per year. All 12 were Bipolar Bunnies like me. I would give you a link but I am too manic to find the reference right now. 

I am grateful I do not get drunk over this crap and fuck 50 people anymore. Mostly because now that I am older than dirt getting drunk like I used to would kill me for sure. Thank you AA. Lady Shrink told me that 80% of clients presenting with drug addiction are self medicating for a mental disorder.

Peace to everyone especially me. I love you all, my friends. That I write this means I am better than I was.

There will be some changes made.

I think I am back. Physical pain is gone. Still mourning. I am doing a complete reorganization of my life and my goals. Thank you to all who have been with me on my journey in blogland. It has been years now. Cher Readers, you have made a difference in this introverted maniac's life. 

I apologize to friends who asked me to write them for not writing them. When I said I CANNOT TALK, I meant literally could not communicate in some ways. I have always had a lot to say. I just cannot/could not make intimate conversation. I have never experienced anything like this before. Tears are on my face as I write this. I hope my despair is gone now for good. Peace.

I am amazed and know not what to say. - Hermia, Wm. Shakespeare, A Midsummer Night's Dream

We have elected someone crazier than I am to be President of the United States of America. And I am fucking crazy. I mean, I am some people shun me crazy. Madder than a shithouse rat crazy. 

God save us. For more immediate assistance:

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline
Call 1-800-273-8255
Available 24 hours everyday
There is also chat available, though I would recommend hearing a human voice.
chat.suicidepreventionlifeline.org/...

http://porkbun.deviantart.com/art/weeping-244745209

Help. I am Manic. I had to take an ativan.

I absolutely hate feeling this way. I can remember dancing for hours and hours to dance it away. Dance until you drop.

I had a newspaper columnist lover who wrote at home. He had a wooden floor and original 78s of folks like Nat King Cole. He would lend me his spare room and I would dance for hours. I miss him.

I ran my second husband over with a Volkswagen feeling this way. Hubby saw the look on my face and his face turned white. I floored it. He knew there was no way to outrun me and he looked around frantically for a savior. He saw a small wide ditch and dived for it. My wheels ran right the fuck over him. By the time I got ready for the second pass, he had made it to the house.

God saved me. Always had a soft spot for God after that. My child did not need to have a Mother in jail. Hubby stayed with me another 10 years. I often wonder who exactly was the crazy one? The whole thing was so sad.

So, all I have to say is, talk me down, Friends. I am lonesome, horny, maudlin and dangerous. Okay, Ativan kicking in. I will be napping in blessed peace and not stabbing anyone. Good thing. Be back later.

This election is making me crazed. How you doing?

The physicians at Penn are some of the best in the world. My psychiatrist is a Penn guy and just as smart as he can be. He has a silver white beard and he looks like a Jewish Santa Claus. He is funny and it feels good to just be around him. I mention his appearance because he said something interesting. "I believe in the old saying," he said "that after 50, one gets the face one deserves."

I rest his case. I tried hard to find one where Trump was not grimacing. Speaking as an actor, I wonder if Trump practices his expressions and head angles in a mirror, but I digress:

Top of Trump

Bottom of Trump

The Alternative. I tried to get one with neutral expression and wrinkles not air brushed away.

Hillz bottom.

No contest for me. What, Cher Reader, do you think? I know, the whole thing is ridiculous, right? At this point, nothing seems too ridiculous in light of what we have seen. Maybe Santa Claus is right. Here is how one artist sees it on Freaking News below.

I say: Let the debates begin! Some people say Trump is going to chicken out. This is the best election ever. Thank you, Santa, for my Ativan. My Russian readership just tripled. Any of my Russian readers want to tell me why? Can somebody translate what is on his cap?

Springing Off with Update

http://www.bloomingrosephotography.com/blog

It is Spring and the Bipolars are blooming. I am out of my mind. Please leave a message.

Trump makes me wonder if I have company on the trip.

Update: Seems I am not alone in wondering if Trump has diminished mental ability.

Does Donald Trump have dementia? by Steve King

Trump’s father, Fred Trump, suffered from Alzheimer’s Disease before his death in 1999. Recent studies have shown that Alzheimer’s affects its victims much earlier than previously thought, and, considering The Donald’s behavior on the campaign trail, it might not be too far off the mark to consider that Fred Trump gave more to his son than millions of dollars and a particularly virulent form of racism.

 

List of other articles re: Trump is nuts and/or has brain issues.
http://www.politicususa.com/2015/06/16/insane-rant-donald-trump-announces-president-rich.html
http://www.cnn.com/2016/03/18/politics/michael-dukakis-donald-trump/
http://bigstory.ap.org/article/648886cc45364935bbd2ea82c8bcbdc2/graham-trump-nut-job-who-likely-wins-gop-nomination

Mental health consumer here, occasionally medicated for public safety. My Doctor suggested I not buy a gun.

UPDATE: Because of the Isla Vista mass murder by a mentally ill man, I thought it would be useful to publish this essay again. My apology to those who have already read it. I wrote this precisely a year ago. Not much has changed. In fact, the gagging of doctors has gotten worse. 

Do you want the government telling your doctor what to say to you? Or what S/he must not say to you? Did Nancy Lanza's doctor ask her about guns?

Gagging doctors and scientists or giving them a script to follow seems to be a right wing hobby these days. Who do we thank for the proliferation of bills dictating what your doctor can or must say to you? Is it ALEC, the NRA, the Republican Party or the Religious Right? 

AMA Supports Blocking Illegal Florida Gun Gag Law 

CHICAGO - The American Medical Association (AMA) today filed a friend-of-the-court brief opposing the State of Florida’s attempt to revive a law preventing doctors from asking patients and families about guns in the home. The brief condemned government-sponsored censorship of private medical discussions between patients and physicians.

It is easy to see why medical personnel might ask clients about guns. Take a look at the leading causes of death per the CDC. Suicide is #10. Chronic depression and bipolar disorder can and do kill patients and others who know them.

I wonder if Nancy Lanza was afraid of her son? Many parents of mentally ill children live in fear. The Police routinely ask medical professionals if they are aware of guns in the home in the course of investigations, for their own safety as well as ours. Do we really want to tell medical professionals they cannot ask about guns?

Psychiatrists and Psychologists who have clients like shooter Jared Loughner and the Lanza boy are understandably confused. They are damned if they do report a scary or aged client and damned if they do not. "Why did you not know they were dangerous?" we accuse. They may get sued if they speak about a client's behavior or their guns. And sued if they do not. Add gun gag laws to the mix. No wonder malpractice insurance is so high.

I think the President has got this. Now let us all make a lot of noise and help him out!

Obama enlists doctors for gun violence prevention

The president reassures physicians that they can ask patients about guns in the home and inform authorities if they believe someone might harm others.

By CHRISTINE S. MOYER, amednews staff. Posted Jan. 28, 2013.

 President Obama’s multifaceted plan to reduce gun violence calls on physicians to play an important role in decreasing shooting deaths and injuries in communities nationwide.

Obama clarified that the Affordable Care Act does not prohibit doctors from discussing gun safety. He assured physicians that they can report credible threats of violence without fear of penalties from the Health Insurance Portability and Accountability Act Privacy Rule. He also authorized the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention to research the causes and prevention of gun violence, work that was suspended in 1996 after a National Rifle Assn.-backed push to block the study’s funding.

Dr. Denise Dowd

“We need to counsel our families about how to keep our children safe,” regardless of whether that involves bicycles, guns or swimming pools, said Denise Dowd, MD, MPH, a pediatric emergency physician and director of research in the Division of Emergency and Urgent Care at Children’s Mercy Hospitals and Clinics in Kansas City, Mo. 

Dr. Dowd said Obama’s clarification on this issue was needed, because some physicians were confused by language in the ACA that prohibits the collection of any data pertaining to firearm counseling, language inserted by pressure from the NRA.

Update: Kansas legislature proposing a Bill to prevent doctors from asking questions about gun ownership. Five other states have gag laws in the works. Why? 

 Sec. 9. No physician, other than a psychiatrist, shall inquire of any patient in conjunction with obtaining the patient's personal information and medical history, whether the patient has any firearms in such patient's home or on such patient's property and shall not require such information before providing treatment.