April Rain Song

April Rain Song by Langston Hughes

Let the rain kiss you
Let the rain beat upon your head with silver liquid drops
Let the rain sing you a lullaby
The rain makes still pools on the sidewalk
The rain makes running pools in the gutter
The rain plays a little sleep song on our roof at night
And I love the rain.

 by erikemiranda

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James Mercer Langston Hughes (February 1, 1901 - May 22, 1967) was an American poet, social activist, novelist, playwright, and columnist from Joplin, Missouri. One of the earliest innovators of the literary art form called jazz poetry, Hughes is best known as a leader of the Harlem Renaissance. He famously wrote about the period that "the Negro was in vogue", which was later paraphrased as "when Harlem was in vogue."

Photograph by Carl Van Vechten - Library of Congress

Information above is from Wikipedia the writer's friend. I send them a very small sum monthly to keep them free.

For Simon Fokt Ph.D.

With laughs, this set runs for one or two minutes. When I remember an additional minute, I will add it. There is more, but I have yet to perform this set since I had both knees replaced. 

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I am so upset tonight.

You are a comedy audience. Get with it. You have lines. I say: I am very upset. And you say: Awwww. So let’s take it from the top.

I am very upset.

Awwwwww.

I found out my boyfriend is fucking two other women.

(visual joke: I am 80).

Men are animals.

Dogs are more faithful.

I said to him, HAMZA: you keep doing the three women cha cha, you will need more than viagra to get it up. You are going to need a crane.

I said to him, HAMZA: you keep doing the three women cha cha, you going to cha cha yourself right into bypass city.

Listen, I am progressive. When we go to Miami, I buy him a beach bunny. Sometimes two. It is the deceit. And the whining. “I want to go to Miami.” One day, I will drop him off at Tabatchnik’s, where I picked him up.

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Simon chastised me for being rude, crude and pornographic. So...? I think of this as giving him some bang for his bunk.

Puritanism: The haunting fear that someone somewhere, may be happy. 

H. L. MENCKEN (1880-1956), U.S. journalist.

 

PETS - A Bunny Cop and Songs for Easter

Happy Easter!

I really like this Officer. I would like to make him my Pet. I want to stroke his ears. The photograph gives me odd erotic palpitations. 

“As for me I will follow the path of the pink bunnies.”― Magenta Periwinkle

Notes from Wikipedia: the Writer's Friend. I send them a small amount monthly to keep Wikipedia free. 

James Clarence Wakely was an American actor, songwriter, country Western music vocalist, and one of the last singing cowboys. He wrote the song he is singing in this vintage film. During the 1930s, 1940s, and 1950s, he released records, appeared in several B-Western movies with most of the major studios, appeared on radio and television, and even had his own series of comic books.

Little Bunny Foo Foo" is a children's poem and song. The poem consists of four-line sung verses separated by some spoken words. The verses are sung to the tune of the French-Canadian children's song "Alouette" (1879), which is melodically similar to "Down by the Station" (1948) and the "Itsy Bitsy Spider".[1] The person performing the song usually includes hand gestures, e.g. for "scooping" and "bopping".[1]





T

Bede's Beat Redux - 10th Anniversary Edition

 April Fool for Love 

“I still believe that peace and plenty and happiness can be worked out some way. I am a fool.” - Kurt Vonnegut

"Everybody plays the fool, sometime. There's no exception to the rule, listen baby. It may be factual, it may be cruel, I ain't lying. Everybody plays the fool." - Aaron Neville

I asked The Execrable Bede for a special April Fool's Day song. Bede reminded me April is the Anniversary of Lady Day's birth in Philadelphia, PA, on April 7, 1915. 

Happy Birthday, Billie Holiday. We still listen to your Songs. We miss you. Rest in Love and Music.

Bede is one of the Authors who made this blog a success. Rest in Peace and Music. Read all of Bede's Beat.

Tradition: The Fool Can Say Anything Without Punishment

This is the work of Irene Adler. 

I am a problem wherever I go. I test the rules just existing. I do not plan it that way. I just cannot act right. I get (de?)-moralized out of human groups fairly often. I just do not know how to shut up. As Lady Shrink tactfully puts it, I am an activist by temperament.

It is the late 80s, and I am busy trying new jokes out in a motel bar Open Mic, where comedians hang out and do the same. Not much civilian audience, if any.

If you are a man, you can stand up in front of the mic and just say fugga fugga fugga suck and every.body, particularly the drunk Penn students in the second row, laughs and claps. If you are the only woman comic in the room and you say the word clit, your fellows grimace and make horns at you and sigh loudly in disgust. 1987.

Women just are not funny right? Women comedians, particularly women comedians who did sexual humor, were struggling against active male resistance. Maybe they just did not like me? Maybe I am just an annoying snowflake? Well yeah but even the annoying have feelings. Sniff.

Jim Gaffigan followed me out of an Open Mic once, I was near tears. Jim apologized for the beating I was taking because I was doing sexual humor. What a funny good man.

I was working out of the Arts Cafe in Princeton New Jersey in a sketch comedy troupe I produced: Ultrasonic Theatre — Only Dogs Can Hear Us. 

When Art Kelly got arrested, every other male comedian had a pedophile joke. I was pregnant out to there and I had this pregnancy and abortion joke. Okay it was kind of sick.

Troupe, I have this joke.

What’s the joke.

The joke is: I am 43 years old, and I am pregnant, but I am not worried. If it turns out to be a cretin, I will train it to eat me and I can still have orgasms when I am 85.

Disgusting. You cannot say that.

Hey, it’s gallows humor. Black humor, you know. Gets people through war and pestilence. I am talking about death and deformity.

Sick and disgusting. You cannot say that.

A woman who is pregnant at 43 stands a 1 in 26 chance of birthing a handicapped child. The kid might have a hole in its spine and never walk or talk. The only test you could have at the time was given at 4.5 months. One could not get the results until 5 months pregnant. Meanwhile, you can feel the kid jumping around inside going “It’s great in here.”

If the kid is defective, you are bumping up against the 23-week mark upon which the fetus has a chance at survival. You going to kill it because it might be like me, ODD, even though you can feel it doing cartwheels going “It’s great in here.” 

t was a hardass time. Nobody wanted to let me talk about it. Wanted pregnancy. Turned out to be a girl named Jessica Lorraine. All her fingers and toes.

I was crestfallen. Shamed even. I am a grown abused child. I have a big problem with shame. I decided to tell my joke to Lady Shrink. I am bipolar. Most comedians are bipolar according to a study I read.

Once, I said to her, “Never leave me.” She said “Don’t worry. I am taking the phone into my coffin.” That is pretty funny for a PhD. I feel safe. She never pushes my shame or defiance button. Woman saved my life by treating me for free for a while. I am sending her a link to this opus.

I told her the joke. Shrink practically falls off her chair she is laughing so hard. I am getting worried. Finally, she wipes her eyes and says

“Mary, I will pay you any reasonable sum if you do that joke for the Parents of Handicapped Children Support Group to which I belong. We will laugh our asses off.”

Who is/was the sick person here? Censorship sucks the big badoodie. Hurts me. Hurts society. I will believe censorship is useful when we censor stochastic terrorism to the same degree we censor sex. It is a pet hate of mine, and I think I will write more about it.

I will close with a short eulogy for Lenny Bruce. For those who do not know who Lenny Bruce is, he is The Fool who made it safe for all the rest of us to say the word FUCK and defecate verbally on religion. The Governor of New York formally forgave him for the crime of obscenity 30 years after his death. 

My Hero who did too much heroin for the pain, played Carnegie Hall and went to jail for saying fuck.

Join me. Let us give Lenny Bruce the tribute he has earned. On the count of three, let us all yell FUCK as loudly as we can wherever we are.

 One, two, three: FUCK! Good night, Lenny, wherever you are.

Play the video. This is a multi-media experience.

“There is only what is and that’s it. What should be is a dirty lie.”

― Lenny Bruce, How to Talk Dirty and Influence People

”If you can’t say “Fuck” you can’t say, “Fuck the government.”

Lenny Bruce — Complete Live Standup (Rare, 1965) — YouTube

WOKE quote for today: “No woman could have been Nietzsche or Rimbaud without ending up in a whorehouse or lobotomized.
― Andrea Dworkin, Right-Wing Women

I say DO IT NOW

SCOTUS went SHAZAM!

It is now like 1945. I thought practicing medicine without a license was a crime.

Rage. I have it. Not a good thing for a bipolar person. Not good for me. Not good for others.

Steve Scalise got shot by one of my brethren in a rage reaction. Rage is starting to leak through into my online communication. Embarrassing. And I do not want the Secret Service to have any need at all to meet me.

The Mother Compelled need not include you in her family or her home. She does not need to feed you or fuck you or befriend you.

Well, say you, “Feminazi, we will pass a law.”

How much success did you all have the last time you criminalized abortion? Or drugs? We have checking accounts now. And we vote.

Abortion was advertised in newspapers in Colonial America before women could vote. No one thought childbirth was in anyone’s charge but the pregnant person and the midwife. 

Now we have put Justice Alito in charge of the American family. No more one and done for ye may die. That cruelty is the Catholic way. Yes, I am a Roman Catholic. And Joe Biden is also. Here is his response. Go Uncle Joe!

Hemorrhage and sepsis in childbirth and illegal abortion are three major causes of maternal mortality worldwide. Abortion is 14 times safer than gestating to term. You could end up being the Mama, Lovebug.

This is not the 50s. Or even the 60s. Women will have sex with each other and help each other. You will be living in the modern equivalent of the Palace Flophouse and Grille. Your biggest Saturday night will be two quarts of beer and a $50.00 tumble at Dora’s Bear Flag. *

Talk about suckers carrying “I am stupid” signs…then they will put your kid, the one you do not know, and you never lived with, to work at age twelve. Sarah Huckafuck has got the pilot program working.

Go ahead and insurrect, you “pussy ass bitches,” ** on behalf of Don Con thug and a party that despises you. See what happens.

My children will barbecue your liver and lights. Like Pirate Jenny, I say DO IT NOW. Women will save The Democracy again. ***

##########

* Cannery Row 1945 — “If you’re in trouble or hurt or need–go to poor people. They’re the only ones that’ll help–the only ones.” ― John Steinbeck, The Grapes of Wrath

** quote Chrissy Teigen — definition: middle/upper-class White snowflakes entranced in colorism

*** Revolutionary Mothers: Women in the Struggle for America’s Independence Paperback — Illustrated, February 14, 2006, by Carol Berkin (Author)

Rest in Peace Polka Queen

My Mother and I do not get along and never have. I tried to kill her twice when I was a child. Self-preservation. My Mother hit everybody, including my Father. I respect her. I love her. It is complicated. I wish it were otherwise. Rest in peace, Polka Queen.

We were sitting in the hospital cafeteria, and my Dad was in end-of-life hospice care on another floor. I broke the news to Mom that I was doing stand-up. “I wrote a joke about you, Mom.”

THE JOKE — My Mother had a unique system of sex education. Around the time of your 12th birthday, my Mother would sneak up behind you with this big stick and whack you with it just as hard as she could. WHACK!

You pick yourself up off the pavement and say, “Ma, what was that for?”

“That is for thinking about sex.”

All kids are lawyers, so you say, “But Ma, I wasn’t thinking about sex.”

And my Mother said, “Oh yeah. Well, that’s for when you are thinking about sex.”

END OF JOKE

Never saw my Mother laugh that hard before. I am not sure how I feel about that. Always gets great laughs onstage.

Nancy Pelosi - Hail to the Chief with Music

Nancy Pelosi   

de facto President of the United States of America 2017-2020
Hail to the Chief!

Speaking to Fellow Catholics. We are redeemed by Joe Biden.

Catholics like me and non Catholics have good reason to despise the RCC. But some Catholics are 'innocent and surprised and indignant' that we are despised. What blindness Catholics exhibit.

We have hidden pedophiles from law enforcement for decades. We are being sued for not providing medical standard of care to miscarrying Women. Jesus expressed understanding for sexual minorities. We abuse them. Abortion is a medical procedure not a secret shame.

A decent sane people would clean up their act before going sin hunting Others. This is the century in which the Roman Catholic Church will stop maiming and killing Women, Children and assorted odd Folks. Sane Catholics are seeing to it.

I am proud of what sane Catholic Joe Biden has done. Praise him with great praise. 

The Department of Veterans Affairs, in a historic shift, will provide abortion counseling and abortions in cases of rape, incest or if the pregnancy threatens the health of the pregnant veteran, at its federal health facilities throughout the country, including in states that ban or severely restrict the practice, the department announced Friday.

https://www.washingtonpost.com/politics/2022/09/02/va-abortion-policy/?utm_campaign=wp_main&utm_medium=social&utm_source=twitter

Oh yes. This is IN YOUR FACE by Biden administration. It is not all that has been done to save Women's lives. They have reinforced EMTALA. Not all Catholics are cruel and sexually sick.

Emergency medical conditions involving pregnant patients may include, but are not limited to, ectopic pregnancy, complications of pregnancy loss, or emergent hypertensive disorders, such as preeclampsia with severe features. 

• Hospitals should ensure all staff who may come into contact with a patient seeking examination or treatment of a medical condition are aware of the hospital’s obligation under EMTALA. 

• A physician’s professional and legal duty to provide stabilizing medical treatment to a patient who presents under EMTALA to the emergency department and is found to have an emergency medical condition preempts any directly conflicting state law or mandate that might otherwise prohibit or prevent such treatment. 

• If a physician believes that a pregnant patient presenting at an emergency department is experiencing an emergency medical condition as defined by EMTALA, and that abortion is the stabilizing treatment necessary to resolve that condition, the physician must provide that treatment. When a state law prohibits abortion and does not include an exception for the life of the pregnant person — or draws the exception more narrowly than EMTALA’s emergency medical condition definition — that state law is preempted.
https://www.cms.gov/medicareprovider-enrollment-and-certificationsurveycertificationgeninfopolicy-and-memos-states-and/reinforcement-emtala-obligations-specific-patients-who-are-pregnant-or-are-experiencing-pregnancy-0Edit
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