Saturday, March 16, 2024

Bede's Beat Redux - 10th Anniversary Edition

 April Fool for Love 

“I still believe that peace and plenty and happiness can be worked out some way. I am a fool.” - Kurt Vonnegut

"Everybody plays the fool, sometime. There's no exception to the rule, listen baby. It may be factual, it may be cruel, I ain't lying. Everybody plays the fool." - Aaron Neville
I asked The Execrable Bede for a special April Fool's Day song. Bede reminded me April is the Anniversary of Lady Day's birth in Philadelphia, PA, on April 7, 1915. 

Happy Birthday, Billie Holiday. We still listen to your Songs. We miss you. Rest in Love and Music.

Bede is one of the Authors who made this blog a success. Rest in Peace and Music. Read all of Bede's Beat.







Thursday, March 14, 2024

Tradition: The Fool Can Say Anything Without Punishment

This is the work of Irene Adler. 

I am a problem wherever I go. I test the rules just existing. I do not plan it that way. I just cannot act right. I get (de?)-moralized out of human groups fairly often. I just do not know how to shut up. As Lady Shrink tactfully puts it, I am an activist by temperament.

It is the late 80s, and I am busy trying new jokes out in a motel bar Open Mic, where comedians hang out and do the same. Not much civilian audience, if any.

If you are a man, you can stand up in front of the mic and just say fugga fugga fugga suck and every.body, particularly the drunk Penn students in the second row, laughs and claps. If you are the only woman comic in the room and you say the word clit, your fellows grimace and make horns at you and sigh loudly in disgust. 1987.

Women just are not funny right? Women comedians, particularly women comedians who did sexual humor, were struggling against active male resistance. Maybe they just did not like me? Maybe I am just an annoying snowflake? Well yeah but even the annoying have feelings. Sniff.

Jim Gaffigan followed me out of an Open Mic once, I was near tears. Jim apologized for the beating I was taking because I was doing sexual humor. What a funny good man.

I was working out of the Arts Cafe in Princeton New Jersey in a sketch comedy troupe I produced: Ultrasonic Theatre — Only Dogs Can Hear Us

When Art Kelly got arrested, every other male comedian had a pedophile joke. I was pregnant out to there and I had this pregnancy and abortion joke. Okay it was kind of sick.

Troupe, I have this joke.

What’s the joke.

The joke is: I am 43 years old, and I am pregnant, but I am not worried. If it turns out to be a cretin, I will train it to eat me and I can still have orgasms when I am 85.

Disgusting. You cannot say that.

Hey, it’s gallows humor. Black humor, you know. Gets people through war and pestilence. I am talking about death and deformity.

Sick and disgusting. You cannot say that.

A woman who is pregnant at 43 stands a 1 in 26 chance of birthing a handicapped child. The kid might have a hole in its spine and never walk or talk. The only test you could have at the time was given at 4.5 months. One could not get the results until 5 months pregnant. Meanwhile, you can feel the kid jumping around inside going “It’s great in here.”

If the kid is defective, you are bumping up against the 23-week mark upon which the fetus has a chance at survival. You going to kill it because it might be like me, ODD, even though you can feel it doing cartwheels going “It’s great in here.” 

t was a hardass time. Nobody wanted to let me talk about it. Wanted pregnancy. Turned out to be a girl named Jessica Lorraine. All her fingers and toes.

I was crestfallen. Shamed even. I am a grown abused child. I have a big problem with shame. I decided to tell my joke to Lady Shrink. I am bipolar. Most comedians are bipolar according to a study I read.

Once, I said to her, “Never leave me.” She said “Don’t worry. I am taking the phone into my coffin.” That is pretty funny for a PhD. I feel safe. She never pushes my shame or defiance button. Woman saved my life by treating me for free for a while. I am sending her a link to this opus.

I told her the joke. Shrink practically falls off her chair she is laughing so hard. I am getting worried. Finally, she wipes her eyes and says

“Mary, I will pay you any reasonable sum if you do that joke for the Parents of Handicapped Children Support Group to which I belong. We will laugh our asses off.”

Who is/was the sick person here? Censorship sucks the big badoodie. Hurts me. Hurts society. I will believe censorship is useful when we censor stochastic terrorism to the same degree we censor sex. It is a pet hate of mine, and I think I will write more about it.

I will close with a short eulogy for Lenny Bruce. For those who do not know who Lenny Bruce is, he is The Fool who made it safe for all the rest of us to say the word FUCK and defecate verbally on religion. The Governor of New York formally forgave him for the crime of obscenity 30 years after his death. 

My Hero who did too much heroin for the pain, played Carnegie Hall and went to jail for saying fuck.

Join me. Let us give Lenny Bruce the tribute he has earned. On the count of three, let us all yell FUCK as loudly as we can wherever we are.

 One, two, three: FUCK! Good night, Lenny, wherever you are.

Play the video. This is a multi-media experience.

“There is only what is and that’s it. What should be is a dirty lie.”

― Lenny Bruce, How to Talk Dirty and Influence People

”If you can’t say “Fuck” you can’t say, “Fuck the government.”

Lenny Bruce — Complete Live Standup (Rare, 1965) — YouTube

WOKE quote for today: “No woman could have been Nietzsche or Rimbaud without ending up in a whorehouse or lobotomized.
― Andrea Dworkin, Right-Wing Women


Monday, March 11, 2024

I say DO IT NOW

SCOTUS went SHAZAM!

It is now like 1945. I thought practicing medicine without a license was a crime.

Rage. I have it. Not a good thing for a bipolar person. Not good for me. Not good for others.

Steve Scalise got shot by one of my brethren in a rage reaction. Rage is starting to leak through into my online communication. Embarrassing. And I do not want the Secret Service to have any need at all to meet me.

The Mother Compelled need not include you in her family or her home. She does not need to feed you or fuck you or befriend you.

Well, say you, “Feminazi, we will pass a law.”

How much success did you all have the last time you criminalized abortion? Or drugs? We have checking accounts now. And we vote.

Abortion was advertised in newspapers in Colonial America before women could vote. No one thought childbirth was in anyone’s charge but the pregnant person and the midwife. 

Now we have put Justice Alito in charge of the American family. No more one and done for ye may die. That cruelty is the Catholic way. Yes, I am a Roman Catholic. And Joe Biden is also. Here is his response. Go Uncle Joe!

Hemorrhage and sepsis in childbirth and illegal abortion are three major causes of maternal mortality worldwide. Abortion is 14 times safer than gestating to term. You could end up being the Mama, Lovebug.

This is not the 50s. Or even the 60s. Women will have sex with each other and help each other. You will be living in the modern equivalent of the Palace Flophouse and Grille. Your biggest Saturday night will be two quarts of beer and a $50.00 tumble at Dora’s Bear Flag. *

Talk about suckers carrying “I am stupid” signs…then they will put your kid, the one you do not know, and you never lived with, to work at age twelve. Sarah Huckafuck has got the pilot program working.

Go ahead and insurrect, you “pussy ass bitches,” ** on behalf of Don Con thug and a party that despises you. See what happens.

My children will barbecue your liver and lights. Like Pirate Jenny, I say DO IT NOW. Women will save The Democracy again. ***

##########

* Cannery Row 1945 — “If you’re in trouble or hurt or need–go to poor people. They’re the only ones that’ll help–the only ones.” ― John Steinbeck, The Grapes of Wrath

** quote Chrissy Teigen — definition: middle/upper-class White snowflakes entranced in colorism

*** Revolutionary Mothers: Women in the Struggle for America’s Independence Paperback — Illustrated, February 14, 2006, by Carol Berkin (Author)






Rest in Peace Polka Queen

My Mother and I do not get along and never have. I tried to kill her twice when I was a child. Self-preservation. My Mother hit everybody, including my Father. I respect her. I love her. It is complicated. I wish it were otherwise. Rest in peace, Polka Queen.

We were sitting in the hospital cafeteria, and my Dad was in end-of-life hospice care on another floor. I broke the news to Mom that I was doing stand-up. “I wrote a joke about you, Mom.”

THE JOKE — My Mother had a unique system of sex education. Around the time of your 12th birthday, my Mother would sneak up behind you with this big stick and whack you with it just as hard as she could. WHACK!

You pick yourself up off the pavement and say, “Ma, what was that for?”

“That is for thinking about sex.

All kids are lawyers, so you say, “But Ma, I wasn’t thinking about sex.”

And my Mother said, “Oh yeah. Well, that’s for when you are thinking about sex.”

END OF JOKE

Never saw my Mother laugh that hard before. I am not sure how I feel about that. Always gets great laughs onstage.

Wednesday, March 6, 2024

Mary’s Place - Hang Out at Your Own Risk

This dog has no redeeming social value.


 

A drawing of Oliver Cromwell’s head on a spike from the late 18th century


In England, the heads of criminals, especially those convicted of treason, were mounted for display on London Bridge from about 1300 until about 1660. Heads were usually dipped in tar to slow down the decomposition process. Criminal punishment was sometimes posthumous, as the body of Oliver Cromwell was exhumed so that it could be hanged, drawn, and quartered, and his head was mounted on a spike and displayed for 30 years. - wikipedia

Stormy Told or A Girl Can Dream


The Mango Mussolini?
Its sword is teeny weeny.
Its intellect is crude and pedantic.
Yet its ego is gigantic.
I am not the only Shrike
Thinks of Mango’s dupa on a spike.

Shrikes (/ʃraɪk/) are passerine birds of the family LaniidaeThe family name, and that of the largest genus, Lanius, is derived from the Latin word for “butcher”, and some shrikes are also known as butcherbirds because of the habit, particularly of males, of impaling prey onto plant spines within their territories.

Play the Music. Scroll down to see a Chinese Painting of a shrike. Li Di Court Painter. This is a multi-media experience. Send some money to Wikipedia, a Writer’s Friend, to keep it free. I send a small amount every month. Annual Fund Raiser.



  • Li Di (李迪, active c.1163-1197), Song Dynasty (960-1279)



Sunday, March 3, 2024

Nancy Pelosi - Hail to the Chief with Music

Nancy Pelosi   

de facto President of the United States of America 2017-2020
Hail to the Chief!




Speaking to Fellow Catholics. We are redeemed by Joe Biden.

Catholics like me and non Catholics have good reason to despise the RCC. But some Catholics are 'innocent and surprised and indignant' that we are despised. What blindness Catholics exhibit.

We have hidden pedophiles from law enforcement for decades. We are being sued for not providing medical standard of care to miscarrying Women. Jesus expressed understanding for sexual minorities. We abuse them. Abortion is a medical procedure not a secret shame.

A decent sane people would clean up their act before going sin hunting Others. This is the century in which the Roman Catholic Church will stop maiming and killing Women, Children and assorted odd Folks. Sane Catholics are seeing to it.

I am proud of what sane Catholic Joe Biden has done. Praise him with great praise. 

The Department of Veterans Affairs, in a historic shift, will provide abortion counseling and abortions in cases of rape, incest or if the pregnancy threatens the health of the pregnant veteran, at its federal health facilities throughout the country, including in states that ban or severely restrict the practice, the department announced Friday.
https://www.washingtonpost.com/politics/2022/09/02/va-abortion-policy/?utm_campaign=wp_main&utm_medium=social&utm_source=twitter

Oh yes. This is IN YOUR FACE by Biden administration. It is not all that has been done to save Women's lives. They have reinforced EMTALA. Not all Catholics are cruel and sexually sick.

Emergency medical conditions involving pregnant patients may include, but are not limited to, ectopic pregnancy, complications of pregnancy loss, or emergent hypertensive disorders, such as preeclampsia with severe features. 

• Hospitals should ensure all staff who may come into contact with a patient seeking examination or treatment of a medical condition are aware of the hospital’s obligation under EMTALA. 

• A physician’s professional and legal duty to provide stabilizing medical treatment to a patient who presents under EMTALA to the emergency department and is found to have an emergency medical condition preempts any directly conflicting state law or mandate that might otherwise prohibit or prevent such treatment. 

• If a physician believes that a pregnant patient presenting at an emergency department is experiencing an emergency medical condition as defined by EMTALA, and that abortion is the stabilizing treatment necessary to resolve that condition, the physician must provide that treatment. When a state law prohibits abortion and does not include an exception for the life of the pregnant person — or draws the exception more narrowly than EMTALA’s emergency medical condition definition — that state law is preempted.
https://www.cms.gov/medicareprovider-enrollment-and-certificationsurveycertificationgeninfopolicy-and-memos-states-and/reinforcement-emtala-obligations-specific-patients-who-are-pregnant-or-are-experiencing-pregnancy-0Edit
View in discussion


Thursday, February 29, 2024

Peeps Jousting! Semper Fidelis!

It is Spring. Easter is March 31. The variety stores are full of Easter Candy. Now is the time for Peeps Jousting. To arms!





"Semper Fidelis", written in 1888 by John Philip Sousa (The March King), is regarded as the official march of the United States Marine Corps. This piece was one of two composed in response to a request from United States President Chester Arthur for a new piece to be associated with the United States President. The words Semper Fidelis are Latin for "Always Faithful."  - Wikipedia





The Voice of the Turtle is Heard in Our Land

Sit yourself down, Mitch McConnell. Shut your dirty mouth. Ugh. You run a better con than Don Con Cheeto. 


McConnell continues to tell pernicious lies while calling out TRUTH in noble tones. He 'others' the folks who invaded the Capitol and demeaned them by calling them criminals and 'the mob.'

In truth, they are real estate agents, firefighters, police, small business owners, professors, and some true whackadoo criminal insurrectionists. They believed The Big Lie promulgated by your party, which McConnell you did not deny until convenient.

We gave you two good chances to avoid the death march of your Party. Liz Cheyney could have been POTUS after 1/6. Instead, you shyte your pants.

Either you are powerful enough to have stopped The Big Lie, and you are complicit or too weak to stop the madness. Or Trumpus Putin has something on you. Either way, if you want to assign blame, THIS IS YOUR FAULT if it is anybody's fault.

This is not a plea for clemency. I want the insurrectionists prosecuted for any crime committed. I want the perpetrators with the most political power enforced first and foremost.

Shaming and blaming are the stupid person's response to bad trouble. The bad trouble of ordinary Americans doing crime and insurrection deserves a serious, considered productive response. Not more gaslighting. And victim blaming. YOU DID THIS.

Wednesday, February 28, 2024

Moscow Mitch in Song - GOODBYE!









I NEVER DID THIS ALONE

I have been doing my dance on Plum Street for a decade now. I plan an Anniversary Edition. Time to thank the Artists and Writers who have shared their work here. This is only the beginning. Living Anniversary Edition. 

Google decided my blog was pornographic. So Big G said No adsense for you. Bad images, bad! This image is Victorian.

I decided to run ad-free and publish what I liked. See the LABELS in the left column: try FILTH AND DIRT or maybe SEX DRUGS AND ROCK AND ROLL.

Here we are, Cher Readers and Friends. Such fun.

I will add a TIP ME button when I find out how. I need help paying for this place.

I miss Bede and Nicky.

"Some say life is too complex,
When you boil it down, it's food and sex."
- Nick Vanocur 




Friday, February 23, 2024

Trumpus Loves Rumpus - Blood with Tea and Crumpets

Trumpus wants public executions? Okay. Charge $1.00 a ticket. Premium price if you want to be up close to the blood and foam. We could pay off the national debt two or three executions in.

Donald Trump Wants to Use the Firing Squad, Mass Executions, and Videos to Turn Executions Into Reality TV - Austin Sarat



What will Tangerine Toddler do when convicted and facing jail? Maybe pretend to be insane for the legal and political space it will give him? He is doing the job now rather well. Or will he run? He has jets.

I would bet money he learned the tactic from Vincent Gigante. It is possible Trump knew him, and Vincent is his kind of mentor. Gigante went to Jesus in 2005. While Gigante lived, he was a mobster’s mobster.

We don’t break our Captains. We kill them. — Vincent Gigante

Quote: For about 30 years, Gigante feigned insanity in an effort to throw law enforcement off his trail. Dubbed “The Oddfather” and “The Enigma in the Bathrobe” by the media, Gigante often wandered the streets of Greenwich Village in his bathrobe and slippers, mumbling incoherently to himself. He was indicted on federal racketeering charges in 1990, but was determined to be mentally unfit to stand trial. In 1997, he was tried and convicted of racketeering and conspiracy, and sentenced to 12 years in prison.

— Picture and quote from Wikipedia — send them money. 

Friends called him Vinny. Vinny was a boxer. Although Vinny’s mugshot is thuggish, he was handsome. He sets my Italian genes off and dancing the tarantella. 

I love the bad boys. Not Trumpus. On a scale of one to ten, Donald is an Eww! Shudder.

Vinny, I wish I had known you. I love the Bad Boys. People found The Chin irresistibly attractive, and a good book about his life and legend is:



Sunday, February 18, 2024

Battle on January 6, 2021 - Quisling in Pennsylvania

Cartoon AMERICAN EXAMINER, 1910 Dave Thomson collection

Scott Perry did not get his hands dirty killing people or bear-spraying police during the battle. He created part of the plan and the ideological framework for the event. I live in Pennsylvania. As we say here colloquially, “His ass is mine.”  Politically speaking of course.

There is a Congressman Scott Perry
Of whom Pennsylvanians must be wary.
What he did on January 6th
Gives the Patriots fits.
Another term sure would be scary.
Up him; down him.
FBI all around him.

Samuel Langhorne Clemens, pen name Mark Twain, was called “the Father of American Literature” by William Faulkner. Twain’s contempt for Congress is legendary.*

Robert Berkeley “Bob” Minor, alternatively known as “Fighting Bob”, was a political cartoonist, a radical journalist, and, beginning in 1920, a leading member of the Communist Party USA.

“The use of the name “quisling” as a term for collaborators or traitors in general probably came about upon Vidkun Quisling’s unsuccessful 1940 coup d’état, when he attempted to seize power and make Norway cease resisting the invading Germans. The term was widely introduced to an English-speaking audience by the British newspaper The Times.” — Wikipedia

* Twain's quotes come from Goodreads.


“Reader, suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself.”― Mark Twain

"The shortest distance between two points is a straight line, unless, of course, you are congress."
Mark Twain

Sunday, February 11, 2024

Just Take My Word for It

I tried to save the discussion with the robot. I cannot find it. Sucks to be Ancient.

 
National Women’s History Museum

“No matter what men think, abortion is a fact of life. Women have always had them; they always have and they always will. Are they going to have good ones or bad ones? Will the good ones be reserved for the rich, while the poor women go to quacks?”

Shirley Chisholm, Unbought And Unbossed

I asked a chat search robot “In how many states can a rapist sue for child visitation?" 

I was a habitue of the old AOL Abortion Debate Board. The answer used to be 11. I am an activist. I can kill you with history and information. I have survived more than one rape. One cannot abort a rape pregnancy in some States without becoming a criminal. 

The robot told me that rape is a serious crime and my question is "rude and unacceptable."

I replied “I am a rape survivor.” The robot then gave me the legal and numerical information. I was so shocked at its initial answer that I not only failed to save it, I do not remember the answer. More than one state. 

I then asked the robot if its first answer was programmed in for legal reasons. No answer. I asked again. Political and legal gaslighting. No answer. 

Artificial Intelligence? What do you think?


Wednesday, February 7, 2024

HUNTER BIDEN HAS A PENIS…and he uses it.


HELP YOURSELF DEAR


Marjorie Taylor Greene
Showed us
Hunter’s dyck.
Oh, my goodness!
It is so long and thick.
I would jump on Hunter.
If only I could.
Damn thing looks
Like it’s made out of wood.
Pornography in D.C.?
Thank you, Peach Queen.
One of the most fetching penises
I have yet seen.

Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene shows off X-rated pics of Hunter Biden with women while questioning IRS whistleblower (nypost.com)

  • Related Names:
    Federal Theatre Project (U.S.) , sponsor
  • Date Created/Published: [California : Federal Art Project, 1937]
  • Medium: 1 print (poster) : silkscreen, color.
  • Summary: Poster for Federal Theatre Project presentation of “Help Yourself” at the Hollywood Playhouse, showing a hand holding a stack of money.

Tuesday, June 20, 2023

Hat Tip to the Great Aesop or A Fable for Our Times


A Fable for Our Times

Bigotry (subheading racism) is like owning a big dog. Let us call the dog ICK.

I have no problem with ICK as long as you keep the dog at home or on a leash. It is your ICK. Play ball with it in your yard. Feed it pepperoni in the evening. Have a beer and give the mutt a pat. Enjoy. 

If you take ICK out in public, keep ICK on a leash. If ICK bites me or a child or shits on the sidewalk, you make your ICK my  problem. And our community's problem. Nobody likes problems. Nobody. ICK bites hurt.

I am a fan of Roland Martin and Crazy Ass White People. This is my idea of a feel good story. Jesus loves everybody. No exceptions. 

Old ladies can be rabble rousing white trash. I have been known to rouse a rabble from time to time. Tell me why you rouse a rabble and I will tell you who you are. Or Roland Martin will. You go, Roland.

Kudos to this Restaurant Manager. He is an educated man who speaks two languages. He protects his business from rabble rousing trash (ugh!) in a calm effective way. He protects the peace of his patrons. 



Saturday, June 17, 2023

I started being really proud of the fact that I was gay even though I wasn't. - Kurt Cobain


NOW, THEREFORE, I, BARACK OBAMA, President of the United States of America, by virtue of the authority vested in me by the Constitution and the laws of the United States, do hereby proclaim June 2013 as Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender Pride Month. 


" I call upon the people of the United States to eliminate prejudice everywhere it exists, and to celebrate the great diversity of the American people."




IN WITNESS WHEREOF, I have hereunto set my hand this thirty-first day of May, in the year of our Lord two thousand thirteen, and of the Independence of the United States of America the two hundred and thirty-seventh. - Barack Obama.


http://fyeahqueervintage.tumblr.com/http://issuu.com/pridemagazine/docs/pride12_issuu


Friday, June 9, 2023

We come a long Way, Baby.

This is the newspaper story that ran one week after the raid on the Stonewall Inn. Notice the condescension and ridicule. Happy Pride Month.

HOMO NEST RAIDED – QUEEN BEES ARE STINGING MAD

-by Jerry Lisker, New York Daily News, July 6th 1969

She sat there with her legs crossed, the lashes of her mascara-coated eyes beating like the wings of a hummingbird. She was angry. She was so upset she hadn’t bothered to shave. A day old stubble was beginning to push through the pancake makeup. She was a he. A queen of Christopher Street.

Last weekend the queens had turned commandos and stood bra strap to bra strap against an invasion of the helmeted Tactical Patrol Force. The elite police squad had shut down one of their private gay clubs, the Stonewall Inn at 57 Christopher St., in the heart of a three-block homosexual community in Greenwich Village. Queen Power reared its bleached blonde head in revolt. New York City experienced its first homosexual riot. “We may have lost the battle, sweets, but the war is far from over,” lisped an unofficial lady-in-waiting from the court of the Queens.

“We’ve had all we can take from the Gestapo,” the spokesman, or spokeswoman, continued. “We’re putting our foot down once and for all.” The foot wore a spiked heel. According to reports, the Stonewall Inn, a two-story structure with a sand painted brick and opaque glass facade, was a mecca for the homosexual element in the village who wanted nothing but a private little place where they could congregate, drink, dance and do whatever little girls do when they get together.

The thick glass shut out the outside world of the street. Inside, the Stonewall bathed in wild, bright psychedelic lights, while the patrons writhed to the sounds of a juke box on a square dance floor surrounded by booths and tables. The bar did a good business and the waiters, or waitresses, were always kept busy, as they snaked their way around the dancing customers to the booths and tables. For nearly two years, peace and tranquility reigned supreme for the Alice in Wonderland clientele.

The Raid Last Friday

Last Friday the privacy of the Stonewall was invaded by police from the First Division. It was a raid. They had a warrant. After two years, police said they had been informed that liquor was being served on the premises. Since the Stonewall was without a license, the place was being closed. It was the law.

All hell broke loose when the police entered the Stonewall. The girls instinctively reached for each other. Others stood frozen, locked in an embrace of fear.

Only a handful of police were on hand for the initial landing in the homosexual beachhead. They ushered the patrons out onto Christopher Street, just off Sheridan Square. A crowd had formed in front of the Stonewall and the customers were greeted with cheers of encouragement from the gallery.

The whole proceeding took on the aura of a homosexual Academy Awards Night. The Queens pranced out to the street blowing kisses and waving to the crowd. A beauty of a specimen named Stella wailed uncontrollably while being led to the sidewalk in front of the Stonewall by a cop. She later confessed that she didn’t protest the manhandling by the officer, it was just that her hair was in curlers and she was afraid her new beau might be in the crowd and spot her. She didn’t want him to see her this way, she wept.

Queen Power

The crowd began to get out of hand, eye witnesses said. Then, without warning, Queen Power exploded with all the fury of a gay atomic bomb. Queens, princesses and ladies-in-waiting began hurling anything they could get their polished, manicured fingernails on. Bobby pins, compacts, curlers, lipstick tubes and other femme fatale missiles were flying in the direction of the cops. The war was on. The lilies of the valley had become carnivorous jungle plants.

Urged on by cries of “C’mon girls, lets go get ’em,” the defenders of Stonewall launched an attack. The cops called for assistance. To the rescue came the Tactical Patrol Force.

Flushed with the excitement of battle, a fellow called Gloria pranced around like Wonder Woman, while several Florence Nightingales administered first aid to the fallen warriors. There were some assorted scratches and bruises, but nothing serious was suffered by the honeys turned Madwoman of Chaillot.

Official reports listed four injured policemen with 13 arrests. The War of the Roses lasted about 2 hours from about midnight to 2 a.m. There was a return bout Wednesday night.

Two veterans recently recalled the battle and issued a warning to the cops. “If they close up all the gay joints in this area, there is going to be all out war.”

Bruce and Nan

Both said they were refugees from Indiana and had come to New York where they could live together happily ever after. They were in their early 20’s. They preferred to be called by their married names, Bruce and Nan.

“I don’t like your paper,” Nan lisped matter-of-factly. “It’s anti-fag and pro-cop.”

“I’ll bet you didn’t see what they did to the Stonewall. Did the pigs tell you that they smashed everything in sight? Did you ask them why they stole money out of the cash register and then smashed it with a sledge hammer? Did you ask them why it took them two years to discover that the Stonewall didn’t have a liquor license.”

Holly Woodlawn 
Bruce nodded in agreement and reached over for Nan’s trembling hands.

“Calm down, doll,” he said. “Your face is getting all flushed.”

Nan wiped her face with a tissue.

“This would have to happen right before the wedding. The reception was going to be held at the Stonewall, too,” Nan said, tossing her ashen-tinted hair over her shoulder.

“What wedding?,” the bystander asked.

Nan frowned with a how-could-anybody-be-so-stupid look. “Eric and Jack’s wedding, of course. They’re finally tying the knot. I thought they’d never get together.”

Meet Shirley

“We’ll have to find another place, that’s all there is to it,” Bruce sighed. “But every time we start a place, the cops break it up sooner or later.”

Andy Warhol Self Portrait
“They let us operate just as long as the payoff is regular,” Nan said bitterly. “I believe they closed up the Stonewall because there was some trouble with the payoff to the cops. I think that’s the real reason. It’s a shame. It was such a lovely place. We never bothered anybody. Why couldn’t they leave us alone?”

Shirley Evans, a neighbor with two children, agrees that the Stonewall was not a rowdy place and the persons who frequented the club were never troublesome. She lives at 45 Christopher St.

“Up until the night of the police raid there was never any trouble there,” she said. “The homosexuals minded their own business and never bothered a soul. There were never any fights or hollering, or anything like that. They just wanted to be left alone. I don’t know what they did inside, but that’s their business. I was never in there myself. It was just awful when the police came. It was like a swarm of hornets attacking a bunch of butterflies.”

A reporter visited the now closed Stonewall and it indeed looked like a cyclone had struck the premises.

Police said there were over 200 people in the Stonewall when they entered with a warrant. The crowd outside was estimated at 500 to 1,000. According to police, the Stonewall had been under observation for some time. Being a private club, plain clothesmen were refused entrance to the inside when they periodically tried to check the place. “They had the tightest security in the Village,” a First Division officer said, “We could never get near the place without a warrant.”

Police Talk

The men of the First Division were unable to find any humor in the situation, despite the comical overtones of the raid.

“They were throwing more than lace hankies,” one inspector said. “I was almost decapitated by a slab of thick glass. It was thrown like a discus and just missed my throat by inches. The beer can didn’t miss, though, “it hit me right above the temple.”

Police also believe the club was operated by Mafia connected owners. The police did confiscate the Stonewall’s cash register as proceeds from an illegal operation. The receipts were counted and are on file at the division headquarters. The warrant was served and the establishment closed on the grounds it was an illegal membership club with no license, and no license to serve liquor.

The police are sure of one thing. They haven’t heard the last from the Girls of Christopher Street.